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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29455395">Author of My Heart</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/BluKrown/pseuds/BluKrown'>BluKrown</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Critical Role (Web Series)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Barista x Smut Writer, Baristas, Eventual Smut, First Dates, First Kiss, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Fluff and Smut, M/M, Porn With Plot, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Strangers to Lovers, Writers</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-02-15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-03-04</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-15 19:22:06</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>6</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>28,263</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29455395</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/BluKrown/pseuds/BluKrown</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Fjord is a lowly barista, trying to live in the big city as he finds his future. His day is brightened by his job, as well as a particularly handsome human writer who comes to the Blooming Grove to relax and do his work. Fjord soon comes to know the Writer and realize just who this rather shy and secretive man is.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Fjord/Caleb Widogast</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>44</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>74</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>This is planned to be a pretty long fic (at least 10 chapters) but with my track record I am not the best at writing a long fic. But we'll see how this goes!</p><p>(Tags filled in as we go)</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Fjord liked his job at the Blooming Grove. It was a family-owned teashop that was nestled on the corner of the local shopping district. It lured in all creeds and races with its freshly baked pastries and unique teas and welcomed them with pot plants on each table, fairy lights in the rafters, a roaring fire in the colder months and brilliantly warm sunlight in the warmer months. The mornings were a rush of takeaway cups and morning snacks while the afternoons were packed with full tables and the clattering of cutlery and cups in their saucers.</p><p>From stocking up the food displays, serving tables, assisting in the kitchen, making most of the coffees and nearly always opening and closing, Fjord had found a job that had him happily tired when he knocked out when he got home. It also kept him afloat while he, slowly but surely, went about finding a 'proper' job.</p><p>His occupation also entailed serving all sorts of people, as the shop was also near the town's university district. Old or young, elf or dwarf, bio-engineers or film directors, Fjord could definitely say he has seen and talked to a few wacky customers in his time at the Blooming Grove. So it was always confusing how, out of all the many people who came through the shop door, that a rather plain human would always catch his eye.</p><p>The human in question was a man around Fjord's age. He had auburn hair that curled down to just above his shoulders - when he did not tie it up - and typically sported an unshaven beard. He was pale, from what Fjord could tell under his many clothes, and flecked with freckles. He had bright blue eyes that usually looked anywhere but into people's eyes and his voice was low but somehow faint and spoke with a Zemnian accent. Even in the summer months, the writer dressed in sweaters, cardigans and long-sleeve button-ups but did add on a handsome red scarf and worn brown overcoat in the winter.</p><p>Many people, at one time Fjord included, would have called this human plain, or even dull. But Fjord had to admit he was still very handsome. He had a soft and kind smile that Fjord often saw as he drank his first coffee of the day or when the sun shone through the window onto where he sat in his usual spot in the far right corner booth. He rarely spoke to anyone, as one did in a tea shop alone, but he nearly always complemented Fjord for his coffee when he left.</p><p>The human in question had a name but since Fjord did not know it he called him 'The Writer' instead. It was coined by Jester - the store's self-titled 'Master-Baker' - in an attempt to stop further confusion when Fjord wanted to talk to her about<em> that</em> customer. It wasn't even a clever name, Fjord had lamented but since he did not know anything apart from the fact that he had a Zemnian accent and wrote a lot on both paper and his beaten-up computer, it sort of stuck. Fjord had thought about asking for his name - even had the stray thought to ask for his phone number - but did not want to seem rude or invasive. So the Writer stuck.</p><p>The Writer ordinarily came to the teashop every Tuesday, Wednesday and Friday by around 10 o'clock - not that Fjord was checking. He always ordered a long black as soon as he came in and ordered a second after two hours. He occasionally got a third with food but this was only when his writing seemed to capture his attention for over four hours. He nearly always sat in the aforementioned right corner booth but when that was taken, he got the table closest to the fireplace. Apart from his coffee, The Writer always had a hefty looking notebook, nearly every page filled with illegible writing, a diary and his battered, well-worn laptop, on his table. He was more often than not typing away at a document, a chorus of clicks as he wrote, and if not, scribbling into the notebook with as much fervour as with a keyboard.</p><p>The Writer appeared to come to the Blooming Grove for a spot of fresh air from whatever stuffy workspace he usually occupied. So therefore he did not have any company apart from one person that he intentionally seemed to meet around once a month.</p><p>That person was a human around the same age, tanned and with her hair in a bun with a shaved undercut. She usually wore button up shirts with short sleeves, even in winter, and multiple piercings in her ears. She typically ordered a latte and a freshly cooked pastry and would sit across from the Writer and discuss whatever he was writing, or at least that's what Fjord suspected from the snatches of conversation he caught.</p><p>They appeared to be more than just an employer and employee, as Fjord had seen the Writer even laugh or get annoyed at the woman in their conversations. Fjord even hazards a guess that this woman was actually the Writer’s editor. Always spending a good chunk of their meeting reading from the Writer's book or a prepared manuscript he must have printed from his laptop. Sometimes she would pull a pen to edit or ask questions and in others, she would take the pictures or take away a copy.</p><p>Fjord had to admit he was curious just what the Writer wrote. Jester believed it must be something very nerdy, as he looked smart. Caduceus suspected it must be a book, saying you don’t get that excited over research or essays. Jester had tried multiple times to sneak a peek on the laptop or notepad, whether while the Writer was in the toilet or ordering at the counter but always found no sign of the actual thing he was writing. It appeared that he was very secretive with what he wrote, closing the book cover and closing his laptop so as no eyes <span> - intentional or otherwise -</span> could see what he wrote.</p><p>It was a warm Tuesday morning, the spring air still cold enough for a coat but the sun warm enough to not need gloves or a scarf. Fjord had clocked onto his shift just before eight o’clock and prepared the barista station and tables for the half-hour he had before the store opened. Caduceus was already selecting the teas of the day and writing in chalk on the menu board when Fjord arrived. Jester, as usual, arrived five minutes late. Caduceus never got annoyed as Jester more than made up for the lost time. By eight-thirty, the Blooming Groove was filled with the smells of pastries in the oven and the soft rumbling of the kettle as Caduceus opened the front door.</p><p>Not even a minute after opening, customers were already inside. Some snatching their takeaway cup as soon as their name was called and leaving while others settled into the booths and tables in the cafe, most aiming to get some of the morning sunlight. For the first two hours, the rush hour kept Fjord on his feet racing from the register to the food displays to the barista’s station. Most orders consisted of one of the teas of the day and one of the Master-Baker’s pastries.</p><p>Fjord also had the occasional order of coffee, which dismayed Caduceus. After all, this was a teashop. The reason why a customer would ignore the great array of teas for the simplicity of a coffee confused him. Nevertheless, the addition of coffee and Fjord had improved the Blooming Grove popularity exponentially. So coffee could stay, though Fjord did get amused by Caduceus’ soft annoyance as he counted the number of coffee orders at the end of the day.</p><p>During rush hour, Fjord did not much pay attention to anything outside of the job. Working like a well-oiled machine, Fjord did well under the pressure as he sped through orders and the occasional task by the manager or chief. Yet it still surprised him that he did not notice the Writer come in five minutes past ten and wait in line to order.</p><p>He seemingly was the last of at least a five-person cue that had been going for an hour, so Fjord could not restrain a sigh of relief as he took to the register.</p><p>“Hi, what can I get ye’ this morning?”</p><p>“Hi, yes, a long black with one of the chocolate croissant please.” A warm and familiar voice made Fjord quickly look up.</p><p>The Writer stood across the counter, one hand at the strap of his satchel and the other holding a worn leather wallet. He wore his hair in a quickly tied bun today, so his features were far more prominent like his bright blue eyes and strong jawline. He wore brown slacks and his nice leather shoes. <em>He must be seeing the editor woman today</em>, Fjord noted. His coat hung on his satchel as he must’ve felt a bit too warm to wear it. Fjord tried not to admire the cream-coloured v-neck long sleeve that he had rolled up to his elbows. He could see the faint sight of auburn hairs on his arms and what was visible of his chest, as well as the faint spattering of freckles. There was also a scratch, not yet healed to scab so it was now a pink, jagged line on his right hand. And two more when he turned his hand. Fjord would’ve pondered why they were there but he noticed the Writer staring at him.</p><p>“Oh uh, y-yeah. What was that again? The long black and the . . .”</p><p>“The chocolate croissant. I’m uh . . . not much of a sweet tooth.” He muttered, averting his eyes as he muttered his excuse.</p><p>“Yeah? I’ve gotta admit I’m the same. All of Jester’s - I mean - the chief’s cakes are great but most of them are a bit too sweet, y’know? But her croissants are perfect.” Fjord found himself wanting to say more but did not continue, he did not want to off put the Writer with his ramblings.</p><p>“Indeed, yes.” The writer agreed, not quite looking to him.</p><p>“So, uh, that’ll be ten silver. I’m guessing to have here?” Fjord asked, opening the till and taking the money the man provided.</p><p>“Yes, um oh . . .”</p><p>Fjord had just closed the register to look. The Writer’s spot, in fact, all of the window spots were taken.</p><p>Fjord stood on tiptoe to see over each booth but saw that actually the man’s favourite booth was not occupied. It just had the remnants of a teapot, teacups and other dishes from the last customer.</p><p>“If your fine with your coffee being a few seconds late, I’ll clear it up for you?”</p><p>“Really? Are you certain? I can easily find-”</p><p>“No, don’t worry. There are no more customers for the moment and your order’s the only one I have at the moment.” Fjord then gave a smile, trying not to show the giddiness of having the longest conversation with the writer to date. “It’s really no trouble.”</p><p>“A-Alright.” The Writer mumbled.</p><p>He waited for Fjord to come around with a towel, spray and a tray before moving to the booth. Fjord was efficient, using the empty two-person table nearby to hold the tray as he stacked the dishes, reorganised the succulent pot and menus at the window, and sprayed and wiped the table clean.</p><p>“All done,” Fjord said, straightening as he put the cloth and spray bottle with the dishes. “I’ll get on that order then.” Trying his best not to smile too widely.</p><p>“Yes well uhm . . . thank you.” The Writer muttered and returned a small but warm smile back before sitting down in the booth. Pulling out his laptop, notebook and pen to start his work.</p><p>Fjord turned and walked, quickly, back behind the counter. Trying his best to control his heart that thumped loudly at the sight of the man’s smile.</p><p>With the dishes in the kitchen and spray and towel back in their station, Fjord made the simple long black with just that extra bit of care.</p><p>Fjord had been hoping to return to the Writer’s table with his order, confidence brimming with something interesting or charming to say offhandedly when he served him but found the Writer staring at his laptop screen, his fingers a blur on the keys as line after line of text filled the document.</p><p>Fjord did not want to disturb so he placed the coffee and sweet down with a 'Here you go'. And returned back to the counter. Although charming the customer was one thing, he did not think it would be at all attractive to interrupt the man in his clear writing fervour.</p><p>So, the morning went by.</p><p>Lunch came past with Jester putting in many savoury pastries and sandwiches, all just as delicious but Fjord knew Jester did not favour them, and another rush of customers. In the crowd, Fjord recognised a few regulars or just striking faces he had seen once or twice before. The Writer’s editor being one of them.</p><p>She ordered her usual latte and took a good long stare at the selection of sweets before selecting the lemon slice. Fjord could’ve also sworn the woman had also given herself time to have a good glance to Jester who was hefting a heavy bag of flour towards her station in the kitchen.</p><p>Fjord took the chance to serve the editor’s order, hoping to perhaps catch a section of the two’s conversation, or at least, have a chance to see the Writer.</p><p>“Listen, I like your style” Fjord heard as he neared, the editor leaning over the table. “ but sometimes you just gotta grab ‘em by the balls, and I don’t just mean figuratively.”</p><p>The Writer’s eyes widened slightly, “But that is almost the whole chapter.”</p><p>“Well, this book isn’t going to sell.” The editor said with a shrug, “The market is in oversupply with books like yours. Tusk Love opened the gateway for us and every other writer worth a penny. You gotta grab their attention, otherwise, there's no way we can sell.”</p><p>The Writer seemed just about to object but sees Fjord approaching and goes dead silent.</p><p>“Here ye’ go.” Fjord says, placing the food and drink by the editor on her side of the table.</p><p>“Thanks, and uh get him another drink.” The woman says and nods to Caleb.</p><p>“What- Beauregard-”</p><p>“It’s on me.” The woman said quickly, pulling out her a wallet. “I know it's a pain but you’ll need it to rewrite that whole segment.” She then looked inquisitively to Fjord, hand in the coin pocket expectantly.</p><p>“Uh . . . Another long black? That’d be six silver.”</p><p>“Easy.” She said, handing over the money needed and getting up from her seat. She looked to the Writer with a concerned smile. “I gotta get going, they need me back at the office. Don’t push yourself but we really need a breakthrough here.”</p><p>“Yes, I know.” The Writer muttered, already pulling the manuscript the two had been reading over.</p><p>The woman let out a sigh as she made her exit, once again letting her eyes trail on the kitchen where Jester was currently mixing with a whisk in a large bowl.</p><p>Fjord took to leave but let his eyes looked to the Writer again. His hand was at his forehead as he flicked through the pages, circling somethings in a blue pen. He looked stressed as his eyes traveled over the words with a frustrated frown.</p><p>“Uhm . . .” Fjord began blankly, “I’ll get you your drink but would you like some water?” He noted that the Writer had not helped himself to the water station only a pace or two away.</p><p>“What?” The Writer asked blankly, before looking up. His expression softened when he gazed on Fjord, probably not wanting to show his displeasure. “Oh, uh yes if you wouldn’t mind.”</p><p>Fjord took any dirty dishes back from around the counter and was about to get to work on the coffee when he saw the Writer quickly pack and leave. Walking at a polite speed until he was on the other side of the door where he began to run. Hurriedly pulling on his coat as he dashed past.</p><p>“Could you quickly clear up the booth, Fjord?” Caduceus called as he handed out a takeaway cup to an elderly tabaxi. “We have a booking coming in anytime now.”</p><p>“Sure,” Fjord called, frowning as he stared where the Writer disappeared from sight.</p><p>Confused by the sudden departure, Fjord took his things to clear away for the next customers. He just put the tray down on a free table to look at the booth when he saw it.</p><p>Apart from the coffee cup and saucer, a booklet of pages lay abandoned on the table. Boldened words were printed in the middle of the front page that said, ‘<em>A Toast To Love</em>’ and just below it, written in smaller italics ‘Written by Bren Ermendrud’. It was the manuscript both the Writer and his editor had been scouring over earlier. He must’ve left it behind.</p><p>“Shit,” Fjord muttered, picking up the book’s worth of papers and bolting to the door, not caring when Caduceus gave him a confused frown at the door. Quickly saying as he passed, “A customer left they’re uh- thing.” And before Caduceus could reply, Fjord was out the door.</p><p>He remembered the direction and began to sprint, praying he could catch up to the Writer before he got into his car. He had not run in ages and in only a few steps his right leg screamed in painful reluctance. But he pushed on.</p><p>He was soon out of breath as he raced down the street, ducking on the road when the footpath was too full of people to squeeze past. Occasionally gasping out a ‘sorry’ or ‘watch out’ as he bolted down the street.</p><p><em>C’mon Fjord</em>, he thought to himself. <em>Just like on the pitch.</em></p><p>Not since that day, with the crowds cheering as he ushered the black and white patched ball down the field, had he run like this. Wind whistling through his ears, cold air stinging his nose and throat but he kept running.</p><p>Up ahead he caught sight of him. The Writer waiting at a bus stop along the same side of the road. His back was to Fjord as he watched a bus turn the corner. Fjord gasped, “Dang it.” And urged his legs to go faster.</p><p>The bus was slowing as it reached the stop, two other figures had been sitting on the bench were next to the Writer on the sidewalk. Fjord wasn’t sure if he could make it so he took a breath of air, “Wait!”</p><p>The two other figures, an elderly gnome man and woman looked to the voice but the Writer hadn’t turned his head. The bus was now before them and the door was about to open-</p><p>“Mr Bren! Mr Bren Ermendrud!” Fjord called, remembering the name on the title page.</p><p>Now that got the Writer’s attention.</p><p>He had just motioned for the tow elders to go onto the bus first when he turned his head, a look of horror on his face.</p><p>Although the gnomes stared, got onto the bys. The woman first and then the man, who needed a helping hand from the other as he wobbled on his walkingstick.</p><p>Fjord made it.</p><p>Heaving for breath, he jogged to a stop to where the Writer, or Bren, stood. “You -hah- left your . . . Phew, left your book.”</p><p>His leg ached, just as it should after sprinting for two city blocks. He held the manuscript out with one hand while the other grasped his knees as he hunched over to catch his breath.</p><p>“You . . .” Bren said over the throng of the city and loud bus engine surrounding them. “Y-You didn’t read any of it did you?”</p><p>“W-What?” Fjord asked, looking up from where he still crouched</p><p>“Did you read it?” The Writer said firmly, his skin a blotchy yet charming red. Fjord might’ve even admired it if there weren't something like anger in the man’s voice.</p><p>“N-No,” He gasped, slowly standing tall even when his leg pleaded not to. “I mean I read the title but-”</p><p>Bren let out a quick sigh and quickly took the manuscript from his hand. “T-Thank you. I must get going.”</p><p>The elderly gnomes had now safely seated somewhere inside the bus, leaving the driver to stare inquisitively at the two of them, waiting for either or both of them to get on board. The Writer tucked the booklet under his arm as he stepped into the bus when Fjord remembered.</p><p>“Y-You didn’t have the coffee your friend ordered.”</p><p>“What?” Bren looked to him confusedly, still averting his eyes, as he tapped the public transport card at scanner by the door.</p><p>“Your coffee.”</p><p>“Oh, uhm, just keep the change.” He said offhandedly and quickly went inside the bus. Leaving Fjord on the pavement alone.</p><p>“Getting on?” The driver inquired, clearly a bit frustrated by being kept waiting.</p><p>“Uh no, I just-”</p><p>The door to the bus closed and meer seconds later it was rumbling past him down the road.</p><p>Fjord took longer to walk back to the Blooming Grove. His leg aching, stamina depleted and his mind mulling over what happened.</p><p>Fjord was under the impression that The Writer was kind, at least from what he knew. He never seemed cold or unkind like he did in that interaction.</p><p>Did he do something wrong?</p><p>The question left Fjord pondering all the way back and even while he returned to work. Not just that, curiosity whirled in his mind. He now knew the Writers name and what might be his possible, his in-progress book.</p><p>It was not until his lunch break at three o’clock that Fjord had a chance to sit down, think, and more importantly, research who the Writer truly was.</p><p>In a street alley connected to the cafe via a door in the kitchen, Fjord sat on an old chair and munched on one of Jester’s leftover sandwiches.</p><p>It was the ham and beetroot one, not Fjords favourite but it beat the vegetarian ones that were the only others left. He would’ve much rather had the tuna or salmon ones, as he had a fondness for seafood and the ocean in general but all were plucked from the shelves earlier.</p><p>Fjord also had his coffee, a short black as he did not have the time to enjoy the taste as he only had a twenty-minute window to rest. </p><p>Pulling out his phone, he quickly unlocked and opened the internet browser. Racking his brains for the name that he had been forcing himself to remember for the past hour, he typed ‘Bren Ermendrud’ into the search bar.</p><p>What he had expected to be a bookstores collection of his works and maybe a news article or review and he wasn’t disappointed. What shook him was the Writer’s personal website.</p><p>
  <span class="u">
    <em>Bren Ermendrud - Smut Writer</em>
  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>‘A Love From Childhood’ (XX43) - 4 1/2out of 5 stars</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Edwin has grown to be a handsome young grad student, to the dismay of his old family friend Friedrik, who only sees Edwin as the boy he cared for in his youth. Edwin desires to prove Friedrik wrong.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>‘A Seaman’s Fair’ (XX43) - 4 out of 5 stars</em>
</p><p>
  <em>A painter named Mikeal is kidnapped by the strapping, infamous Pirate Captain Hamel who wishes to be painted in all his glory. Apart from his glory at sea, Mikeal also soon implores to see his glory in the bedroom.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>‘The Sweetest Bite’ (XX44) - 3 1/2out of 5 stars</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Duke Angleshire welcomes in a travelling stranger who asks for shelter on one stormy night. What he does not know is that he welcomed a monster into his home. That would introduce him to the world of horror, debauchery and pleasure like no other.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>‘A Toast To Love’ (Coming soon in XX45)</em>
</p><p> </p><p>Along with the rather suggestive descriptions, all three previously published books also displayed a lewd and lustful cover. The first was of a bedroom full of lacrosse memorabilia and two men on a bed, one on his back and the other above, both buck naked with the above man’s ass bare. The second was of a man basking in an ocean sun on the rigging of a ship, dressed like a lewd pirate with an unbuttoned shirt and tight slacks, with another clinging to the pirate’s pants with a lustful yearning look on his handsome face. The third depicted a well-dressed man in a vest and linen shirt, mouth open with ecstasy as what looked like a romanticised vampire was near to biting into his exposed neck, the monster’s fingers up under the other man’s shirt.</p><p>Fjord had turned off his phone immediately after seeing the first cover, his cheeks burning red as he looked quickly to the door to the kitchen to ensure no one was there. Scooching his seat against the wall at an angle, he had a second look and was more and more shocked with each word he read.</p><p>The Writer, AKA Bren Ermendrud, was an erotic novel writer and clearly, Fjord might just have stumbled upon a secret a meer barista should not have known about.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Thank you for reading the first chapter! I am really enjoying writing these two and I hope you all feel the same way as you read.</p><p>Please consider giving kudos, comment or sharing this fic as knowing that you all enjoy my writing gives me inspiration &lt;3<br/>@BluKrown on twitter and tumblr</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Bren, to Fjord's quiet disappointment, did not return for the rest of the week. Jester even took note of it on Friday as they closed up for the night. </p><p>“You know who I haven’t seen? The Writer. I wonder where he went.” She asked aloud as she wiped the kitchen counter.</p><p>Fjord shrugged, “Maybe he’s busy.”</p><p>Jester let out a hum, “Maybe your right.” She pulled off her apron and folded it but then paused. “Didn’t you chase after him on Tuesday? With his manuscript or something?”</p><p>Fjord’s silence must have said something he did not as Jester gasped.</p><p>“What did you do??” The blue tiefling asked, stuffing her apron unceremoniously into her backpack and following Fjord through the door to the alleyway. “Did you say something mean? Or worse, embarrassing?”</p><p>“Don’t be ridiculous,” Fjord said but he could not help but think the same.</p><p>“Well, you better say sorry to him next time he comes back. That’s only if he ever comes back.” Her tone foreboding as she shuffled around in her bag for her keys.</p><p>“Oh please, I didn’t do anything that rude.”</p><p>“So you did do something!” Jester declared, pointing the key end of her car key in Fjord’s face.</p><p>Fjord shook his head, “Like I said, I didn’t do anything. Not that I can think of . . .” Once again he pondered what it could’ve been.</p><p>Was it shame? </p><p>Maybe Bren was embarrassed by the possible reveal of his identity. Fjord did not understand the details but it was not like he screamed, ‘You write gay porn!’ at the top of his lungs when running down the street that day.</p><p>“Hmmm,” Jester hummed, eyeing Fjord wearily. “What happened that day, anyway? You never told me the full story.”</p><p>Fjord had the thought to tell Jester everything, she was one of his closest friends. But did not think it was wise to spread the Writer’s secret around. Especially when that just might be why he’s stayed away.</p><p>“Nothing happened,” Fjord muttered, stuffing his hands into his pockets to make sure he had everything. “I gave him the manuscript, said goodbye and went on my way.”</p><p>Jester laid the interrogation at rest as Caduceus came out the door at that point. Pressing the security code on the keypanel just in the door, closing the alley door and locking it.</p><p>“Well, good work today you two. Here’s the tips and remember I need your roster’s for the next month in by tomorrow evening.” He looked more specifically at Jester when he said this, who was the only one out of the small staff at the Blooming Grove who had a perpetually fluctuating schedule.</p><p>“Sounds good.” Fjord said, taking his envelope with his name written on the recipient side. It was a hefty amount from what Fjord could tell, he could only hope it was full of gold and silver pieces instead of bronze. “Well, see you tomorrow.”</p><p>“See ya!” Jester waved as she was in a conversation with Caduceus on the possibility of a holiday.</p><p>Once out in the alleyway, Fjord opened up the envelope. Five gold and twenty-two silver pieces glittered in the light of the streetlamp. Fjord let out a sigh of relief. He was in the clear.</p><p>He had enough to pay rent, hospital bill and a good amount of food. And that did not even count for the leftover change.</p><p>His leg was sore still from running a few days ago, not extremely but it bothered him if he stood for too long. He couldn’t afford the expensive painkillers he had been prescribed so a pack of cigarettes was probably the best he could get at the moment.</p><p>The sky was a blend of blue, orange and pink, with the faint hint of clouds occasionally covering the sun to give Fjord a chill. Ducking into the local convenience store, he bought a pack that, although not his favourite, was far more affordable, a six-pack and his favorite brand of chips. He had been keeping up a good food diet and, what with the tips, he deserved a cheat day.</p><p>Near the door of a closed suit parlour a few paces away from the store, Fjord got a cigarette and lit it with the lighter he always kept in his backpack. The smoke stung his throat but he was so used to the sensation he breathed it in like the freshest mountain air. He let the smoke come out of his nostrils as he rolled the tab between his thumb and forefinger. Letting his brain and painful leg ease with the help of the nicotine.</p><p>He was near the end of the cigarette, recalling if he had paid the right amount for parking when something - or rather someone - caught his eye.</p><p>The Writer was leaving a soon closing bookshop. There was a paper bag in his arms that he held close to his chest when he crossed the road. He had his hair down and wore an orange and yellow sweater with slacks, a red scarf around his neck which he hid under as a cold breeze blew about the street.  Bren took his place at the bus stop, straightening his sweater before eyeing the bus timetable. He then checked his phone before peaking into the brown paper bag to eye the contents.</p><p>Fjord wanted to go over and say hello. Apologise for any confusion or inconvenience and offer up to never tell a soul what he knew. </p><p><em>No</em>, Fjord told himself, <em>You don’t want him to think you'</em><em>re a creep </em>and<em> a stalker</em>.</p><p>Fjord did not feel the pain in his right leg now as the knee jittered with nervous energy at the sight of the Writer, the indecision between going to him or leaving him alone keeping him still.</p><p><em>Fuck it,</em> he thought. Taking one last breath from his cigarette, he dulled the light under his foot and threw away what was left in the bin nearby. He then walked over.</p><p>“Uh . . . Mr Bren?” Fjord could see the Writer instantly stiffen at the name. For a moment, he was worried he might not even look to him. But he did. The Writer turned to Fjord as he closed the paper bag, something like fear in his eyes.  “Hi. Uh, sorry, I just wanted to say hello and-”</p><p>“M-My name is not Bren.” The Writer said curtly, although Fjord could hear the stutter.</p><p>“What?”</p><p>“My name is not Bren, it’s . . . it’s my pen name.”</p><p>Fjord opened his mouth at that, “Oh . . .” Taking a moment to let it sink in. Which it did and suddenly- “Oh shit! I-I mean, I’m sorry. I didn’t realise . . . Dang it, did I uh, reveal you by accident or somethin’?”</p><p>“I don’t think so, no.”</p><p>“Well, I’m sorry for the mistake. I probably would have caused a lot of trouble if someone else knew.”</p><p>“It's fine . . .” He gave Fjord a nervous sort of smile, “It could not have been helped, you did not know my real name.”</p><p>“No, I uh, didn’t,” Fjord mumbled in a chuckled, scratching the back of his neck nervously. “But . . . Could I ask for your real name? Only if you want to. Just to stop from any further confusion-”</p><p>“Caleb Widogast.” The Writer said clearly, averting his eyes as a pink flush coloured his cheeks. </p><p>“Caleb . . .” Fjord mumbled under his breath, it suited him.</p><p>“And your name?” Caleb asked expectantly.</p><p>“Oh, uhm, Fjord. Fjord Stone. And, again, I’m sorry for the trouble I caused.” He hoped he sounded sincere because he was. He could only hope that Caleb would return to the Blooming Grove again, even if it was within this awkward air between them.</p><p>“I-It is fine, really. I should be thanking you actually.” Caleb admitted, his eyes looking to Fjord’s for the first time. “I had my mind elsewhere, you saw me run out after all. But . . . Thanks to you I finished my draft and handed it in on time. I do not know what I would have done if you had not brought it.”</p><p>“It’s nothing really,” Fjord muttered, a blush of his own warming his skin at the praise. “It seemed that you were in a right funk after that meeting with that lady so I knew it wouldn't have been good to leave it for you to pick up later.”</p><p>Caleb smiled and nodded, “Yes, well, that was pretty much it. I realised I would be late to pick up Frumpkin so I ran out without a second thought.”</p><p>“Um . . .” Fjord paused, “Frumpkin?”</p><p> </p><p>“Oh yes, that’s my cat, you see.” Caleb remarked as a warmness grew in his eyes. “He’s more a kitten than a cat, actually. He had to get some more shots done that day so I had to pick him up. I didn’t want to keep him waiting because the vet makes him anxious. I actually think he knows when we are going to the vet, he really did fight his way into the basket that morning.”</p><p><em>So that was what those scratches were from</em>.</p><p>“But Frumpkin is ok, then?”</p><p>“Oh yes, he just hates the vet is all. He seemed mad at me for the rest of the night but that’s cats for you.” He then looked to Fjord and smiled.</p><p>“I’ve never had a cat before so I wouldn’t know.”</p><p>“Well, I know they can be temperamental but they really are a gift.” He looked off, clearly thinking about his cat at this very moment.</p><p>Fjord may have been confused by such eagerness to talk cats with a near stranger, but Caleb truly did hold him captivated. It was nice to see him smile, even if it was about cats of all things. Fjord could only wonder if he could make him smile like that someday.</p><p>“Well if I ever need advice on cats I know who to talk to,” Fjord says jokingly, stuffing his hands in his pockets to keep them warm and to stop them fidgeting. “Listen . . . uh, I know you accepted my apology but . . . I would like to make it up to you. Like a drink or something? Not like my coffee, of course, but like . . . maybe a, uh, beer or I mean, anything you would like.”</p><p>Fjord could not look at Caleb after that so he stared across the road at the traffic light a store or two away while his cheeks and neck burned from embarrassment at the boldness he did not know he had. It was out of nowhere but he did not see any other way of asking to see Caleb outside of the Blooming Grove. Not unless he ran into him at bus stops again, which he doubted.</p><p>There was a silence as Fjord waited for Caleb to reply. He was probably thinking of rejecting him. Probably weirded out but the sudden offer and would much rather stay as near-strangers who happen to occupy the same cafe.</p><p>“. . . Sure. Maybe not a drink but dinner at least.”</p><p>Fjord looked to Caleb to see a weak but nervous smile on his lips as one of his hands fiddled with a rip in the paper bag he still held to his chest. </p><p>“R-Really?” Caleb nodded. “Cool, great . . . Uh . . . When are you available?”</p><p>“I could do Sunday. Otherwise, I’ll have to check my-”</p><p>“Sunday works fine.” Fjord interrupted curtly, he had a full day shift but Caduceus probably would not mind if he clocked off early. </p><p>“Great,” Caleb replied, “Would you uhm . . . Like my phone number? It might be easier to talk and organise it.”</p><p>“Definitely, yeah.” He pulled out his phone, which was practically in his hand within his pocket already, and handed it to Caleb to type his name and number in.</p><p><em>Sunday . . . That was only two days away</em>, Fjord thought giddily.</p><p>Caleb had just handed his phone back when the sound of the low but loud rumbling of the bus came around the same corner as Tuesday and parked where they stood. </p><p>“Well, I better be going then,” Caleb said, giving Fjord a polite nod before climbing onboard.</p><p>Fjord nodded, “Yeah, see you Sunday.”</p><p>“Yes, Sunday.” Caleb repeated before, again, he moved further into the bus.</p><p>The bus driver looked to Fjord curiously until Fjord noticed and took a step back, silently saying he was not joining Caleb - although he did wish he could. Fjord watched the bus, catching Caleb in one of the windows pulling out a book from the paperbag in his arm.</p><p><em>Sunday</em>, Fjord repeated, his heart fluttering wildly in his chest. <em>Sunday</em>. He affirmed again.</p><p>The thought was the only thing on his mind all the way to his car and all the way home.</p><p>Dinner with Caleb, the Writer. </p><p>He did not have any idea what dinner would entail but knowing he would spend time with Caleb had him happy for the rest of the evening.</p><p>Once he was home and lying on the bed inside his studio apartment, he unlocked his phone. It was still open on the contact display, where he had left it earlier. There was no photo but ‘<em>Caleb Widogast</em>’ was written for a content name and a phone number filled the respected section.</p><p>Checking the time, it had been about half an hour since he had watched Caleb leave by bus. Surely it wasn’t too early to text him? </p><p>Fjord recalled that he had already put himself out there once so it was best to keep up the precedent. </p><p>
  <strong>Hey Caleb, this is Fjord</strong>
</p><p>
  <em>No, too ordinary.</em>
</p><p>
  <strong>Howdy, Fjord here from the Blooming Grove</strong>
</p><p>
  <em>No, far too corny.</em>
</p><p>
  <strong>Hi, this is Fjord and I’m looking forward to seeing you Sunday</strong>
</p><p>
  <em>God, just write him a formal email why don’t you?</em>
</p><p>Fjord spent a good five minutes staring at the blinking text cursor, feeling like it was almost mocking him. </p><p>
  <strong>Fjord: Hi, this is Fjord. What sort of dinner would you be interested in?</strong>
</p><p><em>Not the wors</em>t, he lamented. <em>Simple and starts off a conversation</em>. So he pressed send, turned off his phone and let it lie on his chest as he stared at the ceiling.</p><p>Fjord had not really texted a guy before. Well, a guy he was romantically interested in at least.</p><p>Fjord had figured out he was bi in university but, what with being in a rather hyper-masculine group of soccer players most of the time, he did not find himself venturing to queer events or gay bars - as part of him wished he did. He had only ever dated women, and even then there were only a few. Two girls in high school, a one one-night-stand in university and his ex, Avantika. </p><p>He tried not to think of his last relationship, it still left a sour taste in his mouth just seeing her social media posts or old text messages that he could not quite commit to deleting. He even still had the yearning to text or call her still, maybe she would say sorry for everything and ask-</p><p><em>Stop it</em>, Fjord told himself. <em>That’s enough about her</em>.</p><p>Thinking back and away from the soccer team manager that had ruined his life for a good two years, he thought about the men he had had feelings for in the past.</p><p>Before university, he had just thought he had admired his soccer coach and that one boy from summer camp. Boy, how he was wrong. Straight kids didn’t jerk off to the thought of them naked, just like he did girls. Or get jealous when they got girlfriends.</p><p>All the thoughts of inexperience just made Fjord hope that he did not slip up again with Caleb. He didn’t want to get his hopes up but this was, at the very least, a chance to pursue someone new in over two years. </p><p>Then his phone buzzed, quickly lifting the screen to eye view, Fjord was not disappointed to see a new message from <em>Caleb Widogast</em>.</p><p>
  <strong>Caleb: Hello Fjord. I am not at all picky but I do have a favourite Menagerien place I get takeaway from regularly.</strong>
</p><p>Fjord was just thinking of a reply when another text came through.</p><p>
  <strong>Caleb: But if you have a suggestion I am more than happy to go with that.</strong>
</p><p>Fjord let out a soft huff, flattered by the consideration. He didn’t text back straight away, however, not wanting to seem like he was actually waiting for a text - which he definitely was - so he waited about five minutes before responding back.</p><p>
  <strong>Fjord: Menagerien sounds great. I don’t have a good place near me so that sounds perfect</strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>Fjord: What time works for you? I should be free from 5 </strong>
</p><p>Caleb’s reply was quick, to Fjord’s relief.</p><p>
  <strong>Caleb: Well I will send you the address.</strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>Caleb: I am in a meeting until 5:30, so perhaps go for meeting at 6:00?</strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>Fjord: Works for me</strong>
</p><p>Fjord did not want to end it there, but it took him a second to think of something to ask. He wanted to ask about the meeting but since he already knew a bit too much about Caleb’s career he thought it best not to dig too deeply at this point. But then he remembered.</p><p>
  <strong>Fjord: How is your cat? I would love to see a photo</strong>
</p><p>The reply for this one took a bit longer and Fjord was just about to consider opening those chips he bought earlier when a notification went off.</p><p>
  <strong>Caleb: Frumpkin is doing well. I actually bought a toy for him as a sorry present.</strong>
</p><p>Fjord was still in the midst of chuckling at the thought of giving a present to a cat as an apology as a picture came through.</p><p>What Fjord thought must be a Bengal cat - he did not know cat breeds very well - with tawny fur and black-brown stripes. On his back, Frumpkin’s pupils were dilated while he stared at, just below the camera, a toy hanging from a string. The handle of the toy was just in view and what Fjord presumed was Caleb’s freckled and cat-scratched hand controlling it.</p><p>
  <strong>Fjord: I’m sure Frumpkin is grateful for the present. He looks very cute</strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>Caleb: Well, he does not seem upset to cuddle me so I think that’s all that matters. </strong>
</p><p>Fjord was just thinking of a response when Caleb messaged again.</p><p>
  <strong>Caleb: Sorry but I’ll have to stop texting now. I have some writing I must get done. Have a good night and I will see you Sunday.</strong>
</p><p>Fjord only felt a little disappointed but pushed it aside at the thought of Sunday. So he sat up from his bed to text one last time.</p><p>
  <strong>Fjord: No worries, work is important. Good night and I will see you at 6 on Sunday :)</strong>
</p><p>Fjord took a second to reconsider the smiley emoticon. By extension of the almost formal tone Caleb texted in, Fjord wondered if it would be rude to use it. But Fjord thought, how else would Caleb know Fjord was happy and excited otherwise? He was not a particularly emotional texter, after all. </p><p>So he sent the text with the emoticon and went to get himself some dinner. Humming a soft tune, Fjord allowed himself to contemplate just what this date would be like.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I love writing the dorky giddiness you feel when you are looking forward to a date (whether first or otherwise) hopefully ive managed to portray that :s</p><p>Pls give kudo and comment<br/>@BluKrown on tiwtter and tumblr</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>turns out, if your whole state goes into a 5-day lockdown, it gives you a great amount of time to start writing up a long chapter fanfic.<br/>the lockdown is coming to an end tonight so I will say I won't be able to post a chapter a day but I am going to try my best to keep a consistent posting schedule. so fingers crossed :s</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Fjord expected to find the time running up to his dinner with Caleb to be excruciatingly long, which it most definitely was, but the weekend had also flashed past at times too.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>While at work, the minutes went by like hours as nearly all Saturday had him stuck at the Blooming Grove's counter serving. But each time he sat down to rest or look to his phone, or even just enough time to spare a thought for what to do Sunday night, the next customer was at the register or Caduceus needed him for something important.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>By the time he got home, he was far too worn out to give that night’s dinner or Sunday’s much thought before going to sleep for the night. Sunday did not do much better, with a festival of sorts at the nearby university, many local and out-of-region customers were needing teas and coffees throughout the day. When the clock reached four-thirty, Fjord even worried that Caduceus might request for him to stay back. But luckily, Caduceus reassured him he was free to go at five o’clock as the Blooming Grove was only serving an event of twenty or so, an engagement party, and Caduceus had already called in one of his siblings to take up Fjord’s place.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord had just less than an hour to get home, dress and mentally prepare himself for dinner. </span>
  <span>He tried to brainstorm some conversation ideas as he took a shower. Then trying to recall all he knew about Caleb as he pondered over what to wear. </span>
  <span>Fjord had to admit, he did not know much about him. Sure, he was a smut writer and liked cats but other than that . . .</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord stared at the three button-up shirts he had pulled out of his closet, thankful none of them were wrinkled as he did not have an iron. Green with faint yellow stripes, blue with dark faint dots or simple black. Fjord wished he owned a few more options but he never was the best at shopping.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He could not wear the black one, as the only nice pants he owned were black so he did not like the idea of looking like he was going to a funeral. Fjord looked keenly at the green shirt but considered that it might clash with his green skin. It was a shirt from summer two years agor, when he was tanned from being out every day on the soccer field in the hot sun. Just coming out of winter, Fjord looked to see he was more emerald green than pine green now. The only one left was the blue and even that one gave Fjord some doubts.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He looked at his phone to check the weather when he caught sight of the time. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Shit! It was already five-forty five and he had spent most of his time staring at his shirts.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Not having any more time for contemplation, Fjord pulled on the blue shirt, black trousers and his nicer shoes. At the door, he patted himself down for his wallet, keys and phone and looked wearily at the lighter he had left on the kitchen counter.</span>
</p><p>
  <span><em>No</em>, he thought. He did not want to show Caleb his bad habits. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Out of his apartment, down the four flights of stairs - he had no time to wait for the elevator - and out to his car in the basement. It was nothing impressive, just a well-loved silver sedan that he bought third-hand in his first year of university. He had to admit, it was still running well and just needed a look-over from time to time. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>On the road Fjord was relieved to find some mints he always kept in the car compartment, slotting two of them in his mouth as he realised he had not brushed his teeth before leaving. He could only pray that he did not have any food around his tusk - as it sometimes did if he did not floss. </span>
  <span>Fjord had recognised the restaurant’s address, having driven down there a few times before so he saved a good few minutes not looking up directions on his phone. Luck was also on his side as he only hit one red-light on his whole drive, making up for a few lost minutes. Fjord usually did not mind if he was late but when it came to a date, especially with the guy he had been quietly crushing over, he really did not want to give a bad impression. So he thanked whatever upper power there was out there that he made it to the restaurant at five-fifty five with a free parking spot just near the door.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Every kilometre closer, Fjord’s heart picked up a beat per minute. Soon his chest was thundering so loudly in his ears that it deafened him to the radio, that he had hoped to distract himself with. He squeezed the steering wheel occasionally, trying to ignore how much his palms were sweating. Gods he was a mess, he could only hope Caleb didn’t notice. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Arriving, Fjord turned the car engine off and gave himself a moment to breathe. He was not a particularly nervous person, but when it came to formal meetings or high expectations, he choked. </span>
  <span>The soccer pitch had been one of them, at which thought his right leg ached. The other was his interviews, like the one her had for the Blooming Groove. Surrounded by plants, ferns and succulents as a rather mellow firbolg asked about his previous experience over a green tea and horsetail fusion tea.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>You got this Fjord</span>
  </em>
  <span>, his mind told him. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Just be yourself and be honest. Worst comes to worst, Caleb thinks this is a friendly dinner and sees you only as a friend</span>
  </em>
  <span>. The notion was not the worst but he silenced the train of thought as he got out of his car.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>A bell rang as Fjord opened the door to the restaurant, giving the staff notice of a new arrival. The servers must have been busy as it gave him time to look around. The restaurant was busy but not full, there were a few large families in the far right section at large circular tables, there was an outdoor section where only two tables were occupied by couples who wanted to brave the cold night and a small scattering of two or four-person tables along a line of windows, a good view of the street on one side and of the kitchen on the other. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>A goblin waiter came up, giving a rather snaggle-toothed grin, “Hello, sir. Got a bookin’?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Uh, no, actually. Got room?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes, more than enough. How many?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Two.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span> “Wonderful, where would you like to sit?” They gave a gesture to the two sections available. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Indoors would be nice, and . . .” He noticed at one corner of the restaurant a two-person table with the closest occupied table being two spots away. Perfect. “Could I get that spot in the corner?” Pointing to the location.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hmm, let me look.” The goblin looked over what must be a seating chart, muttering a thing or two under their breath as they did. They looked up with a smile, “The table is available, shall we?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord let the goblin lead the way to the segregated table and pulled the menus that were slotted in a holder against the window. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Would you be wanting anything while you wait, sir?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Uh, just water, thanks.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The goblin gave a polite nod and went on their way, taking a table’s order on their way through.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Pulling out his phone, Fjord made sure he had not gotten a text from Caleb being late or, even worse, cancelling the dinner entirely but saw none. Nothing but his lock screen greeted him, a picture of himself learning how to bake cupcakes while Jester laughed hysterically. The cupcakes in the tray Fjord was holding were as flat as they had been when he first put them in the oven an hour prior. Jester had broken her wrist the other day but still wanted to work. So Fjord had come in extra early to be Jester’s second pair of hands for a day and that was when he learned baking was not his strong suit. Every measurement and technique had been perfect, otherwise, the dough would crumble and cakes would not rise. Caduceus had taken the photo, a humorous reminder to all of them never to let Fjord into the kitchen. The photo made Fjord smile. But, to stop any more distractions, he turned the screen over but kept the notifications on just in case.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord took to the menu, eyeing the pictures as his brain could not quite process words at this point. But he could not help but look to the door each time the jingle of the bell signalled the door opening.  The food looked really good, he noted, paging through the menu. He had been raised in the Menagerie Coast but never much got to experience the nicer side of the cuisine. But it was to be expected, being an orphan did not much give him the chance to enjoy the better quality dishes but he did reminisce fondly on the wonderful cheap food stalls he had always blown his money on in his adolescence. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord had just checked his phone for the time - the digital numbers announcing that it was two past six - when the bell rang. Giving only a glance to the door, surmising it was someone else, it was not until he heard the voice of the new arrival that he looked again.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>A dwarven woman was the one to get to Caleb at the door.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Evenin’ sir. Bookin’?”<br/>
</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No, uh, walk-in but I believe he might already be here . . .” Caleb looked around the floor of the restaurant and caught Fjord’s eye. “He’s over there.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Go on in then. And let me know if you'll be needin' anythin'.” The dwarf advised, getting out of his way before welcoming a kenku couple and their child that was right behind him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord got from his seat, thinking it would be rude to stay sitting down.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“G-Good evening,” Caleb said as he got closer. “I hope I was not keeping you too long.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No,” Fjord replied, “I, uh, only just got here.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well, that’s good to hear.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>There was then a pause. Both men standing at their table but neither sitting down.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“H-Here,” Fjord started, pulling out the chair that was in the corner for Caleb to sit in.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh, um thank you,” Caleb said, visibly surprised by the behaviour.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord had a quick flash of worry, </span>
  <em>
    <span>Shit, is this not normal to do when you go on a date with a guy? Or did Caleb just realise that this means it’s a date?</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord swallowed in his throat as he pushed Caleb’s seat in and settled down on his own. Trying not to worry too much about blowing his cover as he watched Caleb undo his jacket and hang it on the back of the chair.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“How was work? You were in a meeting right?” Fjord asked, giving himself time to look over Caleb.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>His hair was tied up again today, showing his faint beard that was only just starting to grow out from the five o’clock shadow Fjord had seen on Tuesday. He wore a neat, dark red button-up with a black tie and what Fjord realised to be suspenders. Fjord tried not to think about just how<em> hot</em> that was as he tried to listen to Caleb speak.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“The meeting went well, it was mostly just discussing republishing and my expected final submission,” Caleb explained, taking a sip from the water that Fjord had not realised had been placed on the table earlier.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh really? Is it normal for . . .” </span>
  <em>
    <span>Erotica</span>
  </em>
  <span>. “Books to be republished.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“They can be. If there is a demand for it.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh, well which one of your books is getting republished?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Caleb gave him a confused look at that. Fjord then understood that Caleb had until just now, not told him anything outside of he was writing a book. Nothing about previous ones. Fjord had given himself away.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord let out an awkward chuckle, taking a drink from his own glass to give himself time to think before speaking. “I uhh . . . Might’ve looked up your pen name after I gave you yer manuscript.” Caleb did not seem to ease at this. “I-I only looked at your website. I’ll admit I’m surprised but,” Caleb’s frown furrowed ever so slightly more. “B-But I’m not judging you. I was curious and looked you up.”</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Shit, I blew it now</span>
  </em>
  <span>. Fjord thought. Mentally kicking himself for being nosy.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord did not look to Caleb until he spoke, “I . . . Can’t really blame you for that. I’m just a bit . . . uncomfortable by someone knowing, sorry.” Caleb looked truly uncomfortable, sitting stiffly in his chair, eyes darting from Fjord to his hands in his lap. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No . . . No I get it.” Fjord tried for a smile, “It’s probably a bit scary to have your secret come out. Especially when you could easily get harassed for it or somethin’.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hence the pen name,” Caleb said awkwardly. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah . . .” Fjord mumbled. There was a tension between them now that wasn’t there before at the bus stop. “I know it doesn’t matter but I don’t feel uncomfortable with the fact that you erm . . . write them. I’m more than happy to hear about it, but only if you wanted to of course.”</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Honesty and sincerity is the best policy</span>
  </em>
  <span>, Fjord told himself. After all, he did not have much else.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>There was a pause, where both men took their glasses at incremental times and took a sip. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well . . .” Caleb began, both hands around the chilled water glass while his eyes stared at the rim. “It’s my first book, ‘</span>
  <em>
    <span>A Love From Childhood</span>
  </em>
  <span>’. It was my debut book and fairly successful at that. It still is the book I get the ehm, most revenue from so the publishing firm wishes to do a reprint. Updated cover and with a small bio about me, this time.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord felt a huge sense of relief at Caleb’s openness. “Wow, well that’s pretty impressive. Is it common for books to get republished?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well . . . Normal bestsellers, yes, but uhhh . . . But in regards to </span>
  <em>
    <span>my </span>
  </em>
  <span>type of book, it is less so.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well, congrats. It’s probably a very exciting prospect.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Y-Yes,” Caleb smiled faintly, his cheeks rosy as he looked to Fjord. “Well, if one of your books is republished, there is a high possibility of your others doing the same. It would also promise a good amount of potential readers for my next book.”</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>He’s relaxing</span>
  </em>
  <span>, Fjord thought proudly as he listened. Noticing how the more Caleb talked, the longer her could last looking Fjord in the eyes.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I get that.” Fjord nodded, “How’s about that new book then? Coming along well?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s going along well so far, I have not had a lot of writer's block - which helps - so I am on track to publish in the autumn.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Damn, I mean, good luck. But since you published a few books now I suppose your pretty used to the grind.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes, well, I know my strengths and weaknesses, at least. I have my tricks to keep me focused and a few ways that help me with inspiration.” Caleb then paused, twisting the cup on its coaster for a moment. “Your er, cafe, The Blooming Grove, is a great place for me to write.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Really?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh yes,” Caleb affirmed with a smile, looking to Fjord for a good few seconds before ducking away again. “I usually write at home, which isn’t too troublesome but sitting in public, well, quiet public, helps give me ideas. I believe your cafe has cultivated a really lovely environment.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord could not help feeling a sense of pride at that. “I mean, that’s more Caduceus, the manager’s, doing. I’m only the guy that works the till and makes coffees.” Adding onto that with a shrug.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I don’t think I can agree with that,” Caleb admits. “I mean, the Blooming Grove is wonderful but I would not spend hours there without your coffees.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Really?” Fjord asked, actually feeling his cheeks warm from the thought.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh yes, I’m not much of a sweet tooth so, although tea is nice from time to time, I prefer coffees. And your’s are probably the best I have had in recent memory.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh,” Fjord chuckled, scratching his neck, feeling rather overwhelmed by the praise. “Well I uhh, have been doing it for a few good years now. Got a machine in my apartment and everything.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Really?” Caleb asked, looking Fjord’s eyes curiously at this.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, I bought it soon after graduating. It’s one of them smaller models so it only makes one drink at a time. I bought it cause’ I liked coffee a lot so it was nice to practice. Now I don’t think I can ever go back to normal instant.” Fjord then chuckled. </span>
  <em>
    <span>And one of the reasons I quit smoking. Couldn’t afford coffee beans and cigarettes</span>
  </em>
  <span>.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I see, you must be able to make coffees with your eyes shut.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I mean that sounds dangerous,” Fjord chuckled, “But you know-”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I'm sorry to disturb. But have you decided what you would like to order?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The goblin waiter was back. Their green almost black hair tied in a ponytail now and seemed quite out of breath. Fjord realised just how busy the restaurant had gotten while he had been talking to Caleb, with most tables taken by customers or filled with plates from customers who had left.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh uh,” He looked to see Caleb looking guiltily back at him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No sorry, could ya’ give us a few more minutes?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The goblin nodded, “Alright, take your time.” And started speed walking off, going to the next thing on their endless list of things to do. </span>
  <span>Fjord could relate to the distress the staff must be feeling, so he gave a flattened smile to Caleb. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We er, better not leave them hanging.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes, you're right.” Caleb agreed and picked up the menu.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The two men looked over the menu in a pleasant silence. Occasionally Fjord could have sworn Caleb would on occasion look from the menu to him - Fjord knew this because he too was doing pretty much the same. And after a few minutes, Caleb spoke. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“This place makes smaller dishes so would we like to, perhaps, share a few instead of going for a full meal?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord did recall the Menagerie Coast’s cuisine was more a number of platters than a singular dish so he nodded. “Sounds good to me. Anythin’ catch your eye?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well I like the seafood from this place, they have this wonderful sauce that goes with this shrimp and this fish is cooked so wonderfully.” He pointed at each platter respectively.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh I recognise that one, this squid comes from Port Demalia, my hometown.” Recalling a local fisherman always giving Fjord two sticks instead of one if he came to his stall in the late afternoon.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You're from the Menagerie Coast?” Caleb asked, looking a bit surprised.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Er, yeah. Raised there but moved to Zadash for university. Now I’m here in Rexentruum. You seemed surprised though.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh uh, yes. I have to admit I did not notice an accent but, I’m not the best at noticing.” Caleb muttered, abashed.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well, I did lose most of my accent in Zadash, though some folks say I have a bit of a twang from time to time.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I see. Well, I’m sure you have noticed my accent. I have spoken Dwendalian since I was a boy but never lost the accent.” Caleb even chuckled at thought.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So where are you from originally then? I’m not that good at placing accents either.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh, I’m from the Zemni Fields, more specifically Blumenthal.” When Fjord did not quite seem to recognise the name, Caleb further elaborated, “It's a northern part of the empire. Been part of Dwendalia for years but most people still need to go to school to learn Dwendalian.”</span>
  <span><br/>
</span>
  <span>“I see. And you write in Dwendalian?” Caleb nodded. “Well that makes it even more impressive what you do.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Caleb looked about to say something but Fjord caught sight of the goblin waiter again, checking each table as they neared them.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh shit, uhhh, did we decide what we wanted?” Fjord asked quickly, flicking through the menu.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I believe these four? If we need more we can always ask.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Sounds good. Did you want anything to drink?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hm-”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Have you decided then?” The goblin asked, arriving at their corner table.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes, we wanted these four.” Fjord indicated, pointing to the agreed options. Noticing Caleb quickly sneaking a peak at the drink menu while the waiter was looking away.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“And a Strongjaw beer.” Caleb interjected when the goblin stopped scribbling on a notepad. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Make it two.” Fjord added.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>After the waiter had read the order over again and got their approval, they were off. Leaving the two men alone once more.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So,” Fjord began, closing his menu and putting it in the holder at the window. “How did you erhm . . . Get into writing? Only if you would like to tell me, of course.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well,” Caleb began as he put his own menu back and took a sip from his glass. “It’s a long story really.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m more than happy to hear the long of it.” Fjord said as he gave, what he hoped, was a friendly smile.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I er, used to be an academic scholar actually. Uh, engineering at the Soltryce Academy.” Caleb was being curt but Fjord could sense a discomfort in his voice. “But . . . Things didn’t work out as planned so I left.” He took another sip from his glass. “You saw my editor, right?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah?” Fjord said, pouring both him and Caleb more water in their glasses.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Thank you,” He muttered first as he took back his cup. “Beauregard and I were in a writing club in the academy. She was majoring in humanities and writing so it was second nature for her to join but I joined for a . . . A bit of fresh air from the engineering faculty, you know?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord stayed quiet and listened. Not just because he wanted to know, but somehow he had a feeling Caleb wanted to tell him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Beau saw I had talent so she entered me into writing competitions, with her helping me, and we won first place in nearly every entry. So when I was out of the academy and looking for work, Beauregard offered me a job as a writer.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That’s mighty kind of her.” Fjord admitted, he did not notice Caleb was that close with her. But he supposed with the colourful language the editor often was heard saying, it made sense.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes, it was.” Caleb gave a smile that growed into a wry chuckle. “The thing was, she did not tell me that her firm did a specific sort of book so it was not until I got my first writing prompt that I realised what I got myself into.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord let out a small chuckled of his own. “I’m sure it was more than a bit of a shock.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh yes, but what was even more shocking was that I was good at it.” Caleb seemed fairly bemused by the irony of it all. “So I just kept writing and here we are.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Did you ever consider going back to the Academy? Maybe retrying your studies?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Whatever smile had warmed Caleb’s face slowly vanished. And it took Caleb a moment to speak, as if he imagined just what would of happened if he had done that.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No . . . I don’t think I would.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The two men were quiet at that. Caleb seemably ruminating on things Fjord did not know about, and Fjord sitting, pondering what to do next. He was saved by the Dwarven woman who served their two pints of beer and promised the food was only a few minutes away.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Instead of water, they now sipped on their beers. Fjord still struggling to think of what to talk about next. He had clearly struck a nerve. </span>
  <em>
    <span>I seem to be pretty good at that</span>
  </em>
  <span>, he thought bitterly.</span>
  <span>Fjord was relieved from his worry when Caleb struck up conversation this time. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You said you went to Zadash for university? What for?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord was surprised that Caleb so easily remembered but latched on to the question.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I wasn’t really studying but I went there for sports. I was a er, amatuer league soccer player. Went to nationals and everything.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Caleb seemed doubly surprised at that. “That is very impressive.:</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah well, I gotta admit I was pretty good at it. But . . . Well I injured myself in my final year. At nationals and everything.” Fjord put a hand on his right knee. He could still remember how he had collided with an opposing player and landing with all his weight on his leg. After that it was pain and tears and the uproar of the crowd as he was carted off the pitch, never to step foot on it again.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord wondered why he was divulging so much to Caleb. It was not like he wanted his sympathy or to think of him any different. Then he realised it was only because he wanted to. He wanted t tell Caleb things, let him truly get to know him. As he believed Caleb had done for him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That must have been very difficult,” Caleb muttered, his handsome blue eyes filled with sympathy.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It couldn't have been helped. I was going to retire anyway once I left, just a shame I had to leave when I did.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I see. Have you recovered from your injury?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Er, yes and no.” Fjord replied, taking a sip of his beer and welcoming the bitter taste on his tongue. “I’m am perfectly healed but . . . I’ll never run again, or at least professionally anyway.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It must have taken a lot out of you when you ran after me that day.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah,” Fjord let out a chuckle, “It hurt like hell but . . .” He looked to Caleb who had not set his eyes away during this whole conversation. “I would say it was worth it.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Conversation went freely from there and Fjord did not find anymore speed bumps in the conversations after that one sour end. Food soon came and went, all dishes leaving the table with nothing but the bones and sticks from what were full platters. Although they finished their beers, Fjord had refused another because he was driving and Caleb did not get another out of solidarity, even though Fjord insisted otherwise. </span>
  <span>This truly was the dinner Fjord had been hoping for. He could happily say he knew much more than he did about Caleb when he chased him down that Tuesday, or even later that week on Friday. He was proud of himself for inviting out Caleb, and happy to see Caleb seemed to be enjoying himself.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The clatter of the restaurant surrounding their table was mere background music, too engrossed in conversation that they barely noticed the tables emptying and the calls for last meals and drinks. It was not until the goblin waiter was at their table. </span>
  <span>“Gentlemen, we will be closin' up in ten minutes. Would you like me to bring the bill?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, thanks.” Fjord agreed, looking at his phone that he had not looked at since Caleb had arrived. </span>
  <span>It was nearly ten o’clock. He also had a message or two from the Blooming Grove’s work group chat and some from his old soccer team, who he still kept in touch with from time to time. </span>
  <span>“Damn, time flies.” Fjord remarked as he slowly got up, conscious not to put too much weight on his right leg.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes, time flies when you have fun.” Caleb said, completing the second part of the phrase that Fjord had left out.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord could not help a smile, “You had fun then?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes I erm . . . I did actually.” Caleb said, shyly. Averting his eyes as he pulled on his jacket. “And you?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, I had a lot of fun.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>They split the bill when the goblin came back with the bill and left the restaurant. The night was cold but there was no blistering winds so Fjord did not feel too regretful about only wearing a button-up shirt.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“How are you getting home then?” Fjord asked, putting his hands in his pockets to get his keys.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“By foot, I’m only a few streets away.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Are you sure? It’s freezing.” Fjord said and crossed his arms with a shiver. “Let me drive you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s fine. I’m way too close to waste your time.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No really, I wouldn’t mind . . .” And added a smile. He did not want this night to end.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Caleb thought for a moment but then gave a cautious smile. “Alright. But remind me to pay for your portion of the bill next time.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Next time?” Fjord echoed, his grin growing with the second. “You think there’ll be a next time?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well . . .” Caleb began, his face turning bright red. “Well yes . . . I thought we could but only-”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’ll take it.” Fjord smiled, his heart skipping a beat at the thought of a second date. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Caleb gave a weak smile, staring at his shoes until Fjord had unlocked his car and ushered him inside.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Give me a course, navigator.” Fjord declared jokingly as he buckled himself in and heard Caleb’s click in too.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord heard Caleb laugh and it warmed Fjord’s heart like the hottest of coffees. </span>
  <span>“Navigator? And what does that make you, a captain?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Your words, not mine.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Caleb let himself chuckle for a moment before directing Fjord home. It was only a three-minute drive so barely into their conversation did Fjord park on the side of the road. A five-storey apartment building was on Caleb’s side of the car. A little bit nicer than Fjord’s own, with balconies and trimmed hedges at the entrance.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Welp, here we are,” Fjord announced, silently wishing Caleb lived on the other side of town so he could talk with him just that little bit more. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes,” Caleb murmured and Fjord thought he heard a mirrored sadness in the human’s voice. “Well, I had a lot of fun with you tonight.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I did too.” Fjord smiled.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Caleb nodded with a smile warming his features as he turned to open the car’s door. But he paused.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“<strike><em>W-Was this a date</em></strike>?” Caleb asked faintly, so indistinct Fjord might’ve thought he misheard. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Was this a . . . a date?” Caleb turned this head this time, talking far more clearly so there was no way for Fjord to ask for the question to be repeated again.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord could feel his palms starting to sweat where they gripped the steering wheel. What should he say? Should he be honest? Or act ignorant? The would help if Caleb was asking this to affirm they were <em>just </em>friends. But he thought about how much Caleb seemed to have fun tonight and how he blushed when he was complimented. He could not lie. Not now.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Um . . .” Fjord began, struggling to speak. “. . . Y-Yes. I wasn’t going to call it that but . . . In my mind I thought it was.  . . Sorry, I probably made this whole night weird.” He looked forward in his seat to the next parked car ahead of him, too afraid to see Caleb grow uncomfortable or disgusted by this proclamation.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No . . . It’s fine I was . . . I was uh, hoping it was. A date, I mean.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord turned to stare at Caleb, who was adamantly staring at that same parked car.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord opened his mouth and for a moment no words came out. Purely flabbergasted by the revelation that Caleb, the Writer, was hoping their dinner had been a date. </span>
  <span>“R-Really?” Fjord asked, staring at Caleb,</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah .  . .” Caleb nodded, eyes darting to his wringing hands. “I . . . I better go.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh . . . Ok, well. Have a good night.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes . . . er, you too.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord turned to look forward again as Caleb’s car door opened but he did not hear feet step on the sidewalk or the weight of Caleb getting out of the car. </span>
  <span>Fjord was about to turn to look at Caleb but then he felt it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Two lips against his cheek. They were warm and soft, with the brush of facial hair. And as soon as they were there, they were gone. The car door closed and by the time Fjord turned, could only see the figure of Caleb quickly walking into the apartment complex.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>No way</span>
  </em>
  <span>, Fjord thought numbly. Staring off as he lifted a hand to touch where Caleb kissed him. </span>
  <em>
    <span>No way no way no way no way</span>
  </em>
  <span>.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord sat there for a good few minutes, attempting to wrap his mind around what just happened. The feeling of Caleb’s lips on his cheek had vanished but the sensation of Caleb's touch still warmed the side of his face and his heart drummed ever still.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It did not feel like a long time but Fjord must have been starring off for a good while as he did not come out of his revelry until his phone went off. Pulling it out, he saw a text. From Caleb, no less. </span>
  <span>Swallowing in his throat and with his free hand still touching his face, he unlocked his phone.</span>
</p><p>
  <b>Caleb: I did have a lot of fun tonight. Let me know when you are available next.</b>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord’s face curled into a smile so wide that he was certain would pain him for the rest of the night. </span>
  <span>He felt like a dorky high schooler again when he had his first kiss. He was nearly twenty-five years old and yet he felt like a thirteen-year-old again. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Quickly, desperately, Fjord typed. </span>
</p><p>
  <b>Fjord: Definitely. I will not know until tomorrow night but I will let you know asap</b>
</p><p>
  <b>Fjord: Sleep well :)</b>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord drove home after the text, feeling his phone buzz a minute into his drive and he had to use all of his effort to not look at his phone until he got home. So a</span>
  <span>s soon as he parked and the key was out of the ignition, Fjord pulled his phone out and unlocked it.</span>
</p><p>
  <b>Caleb: I look forward to it :)</b>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Phew, this chapter ended up far longer than either of the last but I just loved writing out their conversations. hopefully it did not drag on too much.<br/>I'm lowkey struggling to figure out what dates they should go on next so pls let me know in the comments lol<br/>@BluKrown on twitter and tumblr</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Chapter 4</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>most of these later chapters are on the longer side but I have a good plan on where this fic is going to go so get ready for the ride~</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Fjord took a deep breath, watching the clock as the quickest hand drew slowly to the zero mark. His injured leg aching with reluctance as he braced on it for his starting position. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Waiting. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Waiting. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Waiting.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>As soon as the arm was at the twelve he was off. Jumping from the starting block, he stretched his arms forward into a dive. And for a moment. Just for a few seconds, he was in the air. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Then the water touched his fingers, travelling up his arms, over his head until he was submerged. Then there was silence. Just the echoing of the water’s depths. </span>
  <span>Fjord opened his eyes but was not surprised to feel his eyes ache and his vision blur with no protection against the water. He kicked with his legs as he reached the surface once more, lifting his arm so it was the first thing to breach the surface. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>In the butterfly stroke, Fjord speed through the water. Arching his shoulders to let his arms stretch far back and pull himself through the water with his legs kicking behind. In these few moments, Fjord’s leg didn’t hurt and felt just the same as he did when he was a kid. </span>
  <span>His strained eyes could see an incoming wall and did one final half stroke before his fingertips touched the tile. He then stood straight, the water only reaching his waist in the shallow section. Wiping the water from his eyes he quickly looked to the clock.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Forty-two seconds.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord let out a tired sigh, </span>
  <em>
    <span>Still got it</span>
  </em>
  <span>. He thought as he pulled himself out of the pool.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The local swimming pool was not too busy today as it was a Monday afternoon in the spring. But there was enough talk and splashing of many swimmers that the pool was loud with noise. From the fast lane he had been swimming in, he walked past the slower ones and past the recreational section where little children and their parents were listening to a coach on the water's edge.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Through to section of lockers at the back of the building, Fjord did the passcode - the four number address of the orphanage - and pulled out his things. Taking his bag into the bathroom, he rinsed off any chlorine and quickly dried off.  </span>
  <span>What relief he had had in the water from his leg was gone, as the sudden return of dry land’s gravity always reminded him more of his limitations. In only two minutes he was out of his swimming gear into grey tracksuits and an old Zadash U t-shirt. Leaving the recreational centre - which included a gym, pool, indoor courts and a multi-purpose field - he looked at his phone as he walked through the parking lot. He was only partially saddened by not seeing a text from Caleb.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Certainly, they finished their evening in good terms, great terms even. But Fjord had to admit that he wanted to be able to talk every day, even when Caleb was away. Too bad he had never been the best at having a conversation over text, well not a prolonged one, at least. He even would not mind a call but he was sure Caleb might be uncomfortable with the idea. Fjord had tried to text Caleb today because he got his roster for the week that morning. But part of him felt it would be rather crude to just say when he was free like they were mere acquaintances.<br/>
</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He knew he was probably overthinking it though. </span>
  <span>So, to keep him away from his phone, he went to the pool on his day off. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Even without being a university rep level player, Fjord knew he should keep up his physical health. He did do weights from time to time but he was always brought back to the pool.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord had loved swimming from a young age, jumping into the ocean’s waves whenever the orphanage would let him. Imagine himself swimming far, far away from Driftwood Asylum and Port Demali. Let the water overtake him and become just a fish, minding his own business in the coral reefs off the coast. The concept still bemused him even to this day, more out of reminiscence than serious wishing. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Rexxentrum was at least an hours drive to the nearest ocean, but that was more commonly via a cliff edge. A proper beach was not for another hour. So Fjord had resulted in joining the local recreational centre a quick walk away. It was not the same, sure, but it kept him in shape and gave him a good way to relax if his nerves were overwhelming him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He got home and set his bag down in the laundry so it would remind him to wash his things later. He took to the window in his kitchen and lit a cigarette from the pack he bought last week. For someone who had smoked since university, he still did not like the leftover smell so he usually smoked before his showers. He sat on top of the bench below the sill and kept the smoke of his cigarette wafting out into the air outside. The sun was warm today, keeping away the chill Fjord still had after his swim and making him regret not opening his blinds to the sunlight in to warm up his apartment.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord took out his phone again and opened it up his conversation with Caleb.</span>
</p><p>
  <b>Caleb: I look forward to it. :)</b>
</p><p>
  <span>The sight of it made him sigh and another wave of memories from the night before warmed him like nothing the sunlight through the window could. The text cursor blinked, ticking away the seconds since Caleb had messaged him. </span>
  <span>Fjord took a breath from the cigarette and looked away from his phone to exhale the smoke into the open air.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Should I have said something after that?</span>
  </em>
  <span> He pondered, watching a flock of birds fly past. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Maybe Caleb thinks it's rude that I left him on read.</span>
  </em>
  <span> Fjord groaned, frustrated by his own circle of repeated concerns and anxieties. Clearly, he was not tired from the swim after all.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I could really do with a chat to Jester right about now.” He muttered as if the gods would suddenly pop Jester into existence in his kitchen, which they - disappointedly - did not.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord had considered texting Jester. But he knew that Jester was prone to multi texting, keyboard smashing and misspelling every word when she was excited. She was not much of talk over phone sort of girl either, as she easily got distracted and lost her train of thought. Bless her though, Fjord loved her all the more for it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He had had a small but short crush on Jester when he first joined the staff at the Blooming Grove. She was kind, jovial and brightened his day whenever their shifts aligned. Luckily, he did not ask her out before realising she was more a sister to him than anything else.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord was certain Jester would be more excited than even he when he told her the news of his date with the Writer. He could almost imagine her squealing as she demanded every detail.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>I’ll be seeing her tomorrow,</span>
  </em>
  <span> Fjord thought with a smile. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Caleb too</span>
  </em>
  <span>.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord licked his lips before his last breath from his tab before he dulled the fuse in the small ashtray on the windowsill. He checked his phone for the weather and saw, to his relief, that there would not be any cold temperatures until the later part of the week. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Which gave him an idea.</span>
</p>
<hr/><p>
  
</p><p>
  <span>“Fjord, could you turn on the stereo for me?” Caduceus asked politely where he sat on the floor of the Blooming Grove.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was fifteen minutes past eight and the teahouse was getting prepared for another day. Fjord could hear the clatter of pots, trays and utensils from the kitchen as Jester got ready. Whereas Caduceus sat - as a firbolg of seven feet tall had to - while writing on the chalkboard they displayed at the front door. Caduceus stared at the notice, announcing the lemon slices were today's hot item. ‘5 silver pieces for two!’, it said in yellow chalk.<br/>
</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What do you think, Fjord? Licorice tea or ginger for today's special?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Uuuh,” Fjord began dumbly as he turned on the radio and readjusted the volume so soft lofi music played through the three speakers hiding in pot plants throughout the room. “Which was more popular?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Ginger,” Caduceus replied, still looking at the board. “But I don’t think it would be a good fit with the lemon slices Jester is making.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Then the licorice?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hmmm,” Caduceus hummed, still undecided. ”You know what, I’ll change it to Oolong. I have a bit too much of it in stock at the moment.” And wrote in a neat, beautiful script with a piece of green chalk, ‘Cup of oolong at 3 silver and only 6 silver with a lemon slice’.</span>
</p><p>
  <span> Jester came in then, caring the first tray of food for the display case and humming the tune to the music. “That’s the lemon slices, “ Pointing at the crumbly citrus biscuit. “And those are the blueberry cupcakes.” She points to the blueberry-dappled cupcake in pretty pink wrappers. She then leaned closer to Fjord and whispered, “Sprinkled with my famous Dust of Deliciousness.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Aaand what is that supposed to be?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Jester gave him a knowing look, “Well, Fjord, you know it would not be </span>
  <em>
    <span>near</span>
  </em>
  <span> as delicious if I told you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord could not help but chuckle. He looked to Caduceus who had pulled the sign outside and was now examining the plants that stood in potplants on the outside sill of the restaurant. Perfect timing.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Jester?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Mhm?” She replied, turning one cupcake around in its spot so that it was just to her liking.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You know how I said on Friday that there was nothing going on with the Writer?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah?” Not completely paying attention as she pulled the tray bellow to fill it with sweets.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well, that night . . . After that conversation on Friday, I mean, I . . . I ran into the Writer.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Jester’s eyes were wide as she turned to look at him. “No way!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes way,” Fjord said profoundly, peaking to make sure that Caduceus was pouring water onto a patch of marigolds. “And better yet, I asked him out.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No way!!” Jester gasped, crouching under the counter and ushering Fjord to join her. “And why didn’t you tell me this sooner??”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well, we were very busy Saturday and you weren’t even here Sunday.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Jester’s look of hurt was only momentary as her excitement quickly overpowered it. “So? When is your date?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeeaah, we er, already had it.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“And you decided to not tell me that either?!” Jester gasped.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Shhhh!” Fjord hushed, looking over the counter. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Caduceus was talking with the elf who owned the office supply store next door. Fjord was not the sort of person to keep secrets but for now, he wanted to keep it between him and Jester. In case things went awry.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well??” Jester whispered harshly, staring wide eyed at him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well, we went to a restaurant.” Fjord began, not wanting to give the more personal details. “Had dinner and a drink - We didn’t get drunk.” He interjected when he saw Jester gasp. “Talked until closing and I drove him home.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Awww.” Jester said, her eyes blurring as she must be imagining what had happened.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“And we . . . I mean, he kissed me.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“WHAAAAAATTTT?!” Jester shrieked and Fjord quickly covered her mouth with a hand.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Jeez, Jessie, this is why I get nervous telling you things.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Jester gave him a look of, </span>
  <em>
    <span>Come on, how could I not act this way</span>
  </em>
  <span>. And quietly tugged at his hand to leave her mouth.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Fjord!” She started to yell but caught her friend’s glare and returned to a whisper. “Fjord! That’s amazing! Was it nice? Did you like it? Did you reciprocate?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes. Yes. And no.” Jester gave him a shocked look that told all she felt. “It was a peck on the cheek, ok? And besides, he left as soon as he kissed me.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Dawww, he must’ve felt embarrassed.” She said adoringly, grinning widely at Fjord. “But this is wonderful Fjord. I’m so happy for you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord smiled, for all the trouble Jester could be, she really was a good and honest friend. “Thanks Jess.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Sooooooo when is the next date?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord’s silent discomfort look was all she needed.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You haven’t asked him out on a second date?!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No! I mean,” another peak affirmed Caduceus was still busy. “I mean, we confirmed we both wanted another one but I didn’t know when I was working this week so I put a pin in it.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“But the roster came out yesterday!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I-I know, I just didn’t want to just come in hot listing out my free time.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Jester did not seem too convinced but her smile was still ever-present. “Well either way, the Writer should be coming in today so I’m sure you’ll be able to sneak a conversation in while he’s here.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah . . .” Fjord began, “About that, I could really use a favour, Jessie.” </span>
</p>
<hr/><p>
  <span>Fjord’s ears were practically deafened by the hissing of the coffee machine as he made the milk froth for two cappuccinos. Eyes focused as he waited for his fingers at the bottom of the metal jug to sting from the heat. He did not look up even when he noticed a figure at the register in the corner of his eye.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“One moment,” Fjord called as he swirled the jug in his hands before beginning to pour the milk into the two takeaway cups. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“N-No problem.” A soft Zemnian voice replied.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord perked up at the familiar voice to see Caleb there. His nose and cheeks were red from the unexpected warm weather outside as only reddened further when he caught Fjord's gaze. His navy blue long sleeve shirt was rolled up and a brown sweater hung off one of his arms. He was clean-shaven so Fjord could see the slight quirk of a smile very easily today.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord smiled back, “H-Hey, how are you?” His eyes quickly darting back to the cups to ensure he did not spill.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m good, thank you. And you?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Alright,” Fjord replied, covering the cups with lids. “Number twenty-four?” He called clearly to the room at large. Where which two humans stepped forward to take the coffees and leave.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Phew,” Fjord let out as he went to Caleb.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Busy?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, the usual rush hour but it’s clearing up now.” Fjord noted as he peaked over Caleb’s shoulder and - to his relief - saw no more customers behind him. “The usual long black?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Erm, yes please.” His eyes darted to the pastry displays. “What would you recommend?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hmm,” Fjord hummed, peaking over to recall what they had. “You said you're not much of a sweet tooth, right?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well, I would say you could go for the blueberry cupcake. It's not too sweet and it doesn’t have any icings. It does, however, have what the chief calls her ‘Dust of Deliciousness’ on them?” Lifting his hands to do air quotations at the name of Jester’s special ingredient.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Caleb looked to the cupcake, “I see, and what in the dust makes it so delicious?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Dunno,” Fjord shrugged, “I think she wants to keep it a trade secret.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Caleb chuckled, lifting a hand to his mouth to contain it. “Well, I suppose I will get that then.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Cool,” Fjord said and typed the cost into the machine. “That’ll be nine silver.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Caleb held the money in his hand and dropped it into Fjord’s own, his pale, pink dusted fingers brushed the palm of Fjord’s hand as he did. </span>
  <span>He busied himself with the register to keep his heart from not coming out of his throat. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Listen, sorry for not texting my timetable when I got them yesterday. But I was thinking . . . if you weren’t doing anything . . . We could maybe go to the park on my lunch break at two.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Caleb licked his lips as he tucked his wallet back into his bag. “I . . . I would like that.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Great, er . . . Would you have a preference on what sort of sandwiches you would want? I know a guy who can make them.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Caleb had to cover his mouth again when he laughed this time. “This guy is not perhaps your chief is it?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord shrugged. “Shes a good dealer, I owe her some fancy chocolates for it though.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“A good trade,” Caleb replied with a smile. “I will . . . I will have anything. Just maybe not anything with avocado, I can not quite stomach the stuff.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Same!” Fjord said excitedly, “I can’t get the hype around it.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You and me both.” Caleb agreed. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Both men heard the door open and looked to see a whole party of university-age students come in.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh, well, you better get back to work,” Caleb said with a saddened look. “Let me know when you finish then?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Of course.” Fjord agreed, watching Caleb walk off to his favourite corner booth.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord had hoped to serve Caleb his order but he was locked in at the barista station as he got over six back to back orders through the coffee machine. He did get to catch a glimpses of Caleb at work, today writing in his notepad. Even when he was finally off the machine, Jester needed him to do a run to the bins and Caduceus needed him to help a delivery when it arrived. </span>
  <span>Overall, Fjord clocked off for his break tired and worn thin. In most circumstances, he would be grateful to sit in the quiet alleyway and eat whatever Jester had leftover for him but not today. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord folded up his apron and tucked it next to his backpack, which he had removed his keys, wallet and phone from. He only regretted that he did not bring a change of clothes as he doubted the bright floral button-up, which was part of the Blooming Grove uniform, would be particularly date-worthy. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Here you go Fjord,” Jester said, pushing a paper bag of sandwiches she had made for him. “There’s salmon, tuna, chicken and vegetarian in there.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No avocado?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Nope.” Jester called as she pulled out another tray of blueberry muffins from the oven, the last batch of the day. “You two are </span>
  <em>
    <span>made </span>
  </em>
  <span>for each other Fjord. What kind of person doesn’t like avocado.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Normal people,” Fjord muttered under his breath. </span>
  <span>He picked up the bag and two coffees then left the kitchen via the alleyway door. And when in the open, Fjord texted Caleb.</span>
</p><p>
  <b>Fjord: I just clocked off. Meet me outside?</b>
</p><p>
  <b>Caleb: Sounds good. Just writing off the last paragraph.</b>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord went around and kept to the roadside of the footpath, allowing pedestrians to walk by. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Caduceus allowed Fjord a longer lunch break in return for working until closing, which wasn’t the worst of deals. He had an hour to relax and spend time with Caleb, so the price of mopping and sweeping the whole teahouse felt worth it.<br/>
</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Did I keep you waiting?” Called Caleb as he left the teahouse.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Nope, just got out here.” Fjord smiled, waiting for Caleb to get to him before directing him down the road.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“How was work? I-I mean I was there but . . .” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord let out a small chuckle, “It was good, I was pretty much kept busy all day, which is a good sign for business.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes, it has gotten very popular in the past year.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, for better or for worse I’m not sure. Oh, and uh,” He gestured with his right hand, which carried the two cups in a cardboard holder. “You didn’t have your second coffee so I made you one.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“O-Oh, you shouldn’t have,” Caleb muttered with a blush.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No biggie, I wanted to.” Fjord said, looking forward to hide his own embarrassment. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Caleb took the cup that had ‘Caleb’ written in marker on the side. “Thank you, you are far too kind.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I wouldn’t say it’s kindness,” Fjord mumbled, trying to be humble as the compliment squeezed his heart. “I wanted to do it so, if anything, it was selfishness.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hm,” Caleb uttered, perhaps not buying into the concept entirely. “Well, either way, thank you.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>They walked for a while in a pleasant silence until Fjord led the way across a street and down the left. What lay ahead was a small but well cared for park.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The trees still only had bare branches but many had budded leaves that were not too far from growing. Most bushes or plants had some sort of flower in bloom, filling the green fields and light woods with soft colour. The sunlight shone in the open field where a casual game of soccer was happening and a few smaller children chased each other near a playground. The wooded section had a littering of park benches and tables for picnics. Most were unoccupied but one or two were taken for the patches of sunlight through the trees.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘What dya’ think?” Fjord asked lamely as they went through the gates. “Cup of joe and some lunch in the park?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That . . . That sounds wonderful,” Caleb said agast. Although his smile was not particularly wide, it held such joy that it made Fjord consider everything worth it. The longer shift, the expensive chocolates. Everything.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Any spot catch your eye?” Fjord asked as they moved deeper into the park.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“How about that one?” Caleb asked as he pointed to a bench just in the outskirts of the wood, looking towards the field. Sunlight dappled the chair but no full light hit apart from where their feet would be.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They settled in, Caleb sitting only half an arm's length away with the bag of sandwiches and coffees between them. Caleb had pulled on his sweater inside the teahouse but pulled it off once after they sat down. Fjord tried not to be too disappointed by not seeing any suspenders but he supposed that was for more formal occassions.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Before Fjord took his first sandwich, he pulled out his phone and set an alarm. He saw Caleb looking to him and he gave a guilty smile. “I don’t want time to fly too quickly.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh,” Caleb said simply as his pale cheeks reddened.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So,’ Fjord quickly diverged, directing Caleb’s attention to the sandwiches. “Those are the salmon, that’s the tuna, the chicken and there's also some vegetarian ones. And no avocado of course.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“They all look wonderful. Are you sure I should not pay for my share?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Nope. My treat.” Fjord said, picking up a salmon one.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Caleb let out a huff as he chose a chicken sandwich, “I really do owe you. I’ll pay for everything on the third date.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Third?” Fjord asked suggestively.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Caleb actually rolled his eyes, “And you mean to say this isn’t a second date?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well,” Fjord blustered, “I hadn’t meant for it to be.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Caleb let out a huff of bemusement. Swallowing a bite before saying, “For our </span>
  <em>
    <span>third</span>
  </em>
  <span> date, it will be my turn. Your kindness is giving me a rather large debt.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord chortled, “I mean it’s you who feels obliged to pay me back. I wouldn’t mind if you didn’t.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well, that sounds like a challenge. I’ll have to think of something impressive for the next one.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord let Caleb think, far too pleased at the thought of Caleb making an ideal date with Fjord in mind.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Two sandwiches in, the men started to speak again. Eating the first few rather quickly as both seemed peckish from not having food until now.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord had resorted to the vegetarian, as Caleb seemed rather taken with the chicken so he had given his half to him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So, you're writing that same book, right?” Fjord asked, unwrapping the vegetarian sandwich and tried to not be displeased with the abundance of green between the bread. “What is it about exactly? Don’t worry, you don’t have to give me the smutty details.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Caleb huffed, mouth full so he took the moment to finish and have a sip of his coffee before speaking “Well, the title is ‘</span>
  <em>
    <span>A Toast to Love</span>
  </em>
  <span>’ so how about a guess?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hmm,” Fjord began jokingly, putting a hand to his chin and stroking a non-existent beard. "</span>
  <span>A toast, ey? The main character is a baker who’s really into making toast?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What? Not even close” Caleb said then laughed. “It’s about a bartender who falls in love with a run-of-the-mill salaryman.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I was close,” Fjord said, pretending to offend his rather flimsy guess. “I knew a gimmick was involved.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“And how would you know that?” Caleb asked with an inquisitive look.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord had been caught, again. At least this time around he did not think his date was on the line for it. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I'm not much of a smut reader but I know about the Tusk Love’s of the world.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Caleb, once again, did not seem convinced but he subsided. “Well, it's based in Xhorhas. They have this custom of compulsory drinking with work colleagues after work so, the concept is this.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Caleb gave a simple but well-structured story idea. It was about a salaryman hat is coerced into a drinking-night with rather cruel co-workers. He becomes a bit too drunk and starts flirting with a particularly handsome bartender. When it gets late the other staff, presuming the man will go home with the bartender, leave him at the bar. The salaryman does try to ask to go home with the bartender and the reader presumes he succeeded. So, for a while, the reader worries that this handsome man is a scumbag who takes advantage of customers. Instead, he is a kind and thoughtful man who took the salaryman home, got him into bed and left straight after.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So,” Fjord began, “The drama comes from the salaryman thinking he did it with a bartender and being uncomfortable around him?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Correct.” Caleb smiled with a nod, finally eating after his rather long explanation.<br/>
</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“And when does this book become a smut book?” Fjord asked tentatively.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Caleb sighed at this, “Beauregard asked me the very same thing. I understand there has to be some but you don’t always need it on the first page.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I guess not. I wouldn’t know.” Grinning when Caleb gave him a bemused yet unbelieving look.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“There will be a lot of it but I would like to put more emotion into this book. My first book was built on the relationship between two people who knew each other for a long time, that’s what made it charming and stand out from the rest.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I can see that as understandable. But you worry it might not sell?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes well, Beau and the publishers think so . . . But do they want me to write simple erotica like everyone else?” He let out a sigh and taking a sip from his takeaway cup. “Sorry, I did go on a rather long rant there.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Not at all. It’s good that you're passionate about your work.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Caleb nodded with a smile. “I suppose you are right. But how about you?” He straightened and looked rather intently at Fjord. “What is something you're passionate about?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord gave it a thought. Coffee was something he was passionate about but rather as a hobby. There was one other thing though.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well . . . Since I was a kid I loved the ocean. I lived right next to it so whenever I got the chance I was down in the sand or in the water. Before soccer i uhm, wanted to be a marine biologist. I thought the fish and the sharks and everything else in the ocean were so fascinating.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Did you consider studying it for a career?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I did, for a good while. But scientific courses were far too expensive and,” Fjord let out a frustrated sigh, “I was not particularly the brightest either. So studying the ocean became another hobby, especially after getting into soccer.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Did you get the opportunity to study at least a little at university?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No,” Fjord replied with a flattened smile. “Most scientific fields are cut off for sports students unless they pass the test requirements. Which, to state the obvious, I did not pass.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Caleb looked genuinely sad at this. “That must have been difficult for you. To be so passionate about something and it not coming to fruition.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah,” Fjord muttered lamely. Caleb would definitely relate to that struggle, as he had been through it himself from what Fjord could tell. “I still read a book or two from time to time but I’m nowhere near how much of a fish-nerd I was as a kid.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They fell into another silence, finishing off their last sandwiches and draining the last dregs of their coffee. The peaceful tranquillity was then disrupted by Fjord’s alarm.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Shit, already?</span>
  </em>
  
</p><p>
  <span>He turned the alarm off and looked at Caleb. “Looks like we should be heading back.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes, I suppose we must,” Caleb said, giving a similar look of disappointment. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Walking back to the Blooming Grove, Fjord was comforted by the occasional brush of Caleb’s shoulder against his as they walked closely down the street. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh, that’s right.” Fjord recalled as they exited the gate to the park. He pulled out his phone and quickly pulled out his roster for the week. “I’m available all of Friday if you would like to do something? Otherwise Saturday morning until twelve o’clock.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Caleb took a moment to think, readjusting his satchel where it hung on his shoulders. “Well, would you mind if we did something Friday? I don’t have anything on apart from the usual visit to the teahouse.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, I wouldn’t mind at all.” The idea of spending the whole day with Caleb making him feel giddy. “Had anything in mind?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Would you mind if I er . . . Kept it a secret? I have to repay my debt, after all.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord shook his head, “No, you really don’t have to. That's far too generous.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Was it not you who said that that true kindness was when you wanted to do it? Allow me to be selfish this time, Fjord."<br/>
</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord was obviously surprised by how well he remembered what he had said nearly an hour ago. “Can’t argue with that. You’ve got a good memory, you know.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I know. One of the reasons I was valedictorian of my year.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Valedict- Wait, I didn’t know you were </span>
  <em>
    <span>that </span>
  </em>
  <span>smart.” Fjord said, floored. “I mean, valedictorian at any school sure but, like, of the Soltryce Academy? And here you are writing books.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes, well . . .” Although he looked flattered by Fjord’s surprise, he seemed to dwell somewhere darker. “You never know where you’ll end up.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They were at the Blooming Grove by then and Caleb paused at the door.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’re not going in?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No, I uhm, have work to do. Besides, you’ll be closing soon.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh, well . . .” Fjord paused, thinking of something to say. Anything to keep him from going. Even though he knew he was due to sign back on in a minute. “It was nice to see you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You too.” Caleb smiled.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord thought about kissing him. Whether on the cheek, forehead or lips he did not know but he wanted to. He knew there were people walking by and that some of the customers in the Blooming Grove would see but he kinda, sorta, did not mind. But he knew Caleb probably would not. He ran away after he had kissed him on Sunday so it must have taken a lot of courage. So he took Caleb’s hand in his and gave it a soft squeeze. And looked to Caleb until his blue eyes were on his.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Caleb’s cheeks were pink and there was a slight furrow to his brow. Fjord did not notice it but he was taller than Caleb too, the auburn top of his head just reaching eye level. His hand was a little smaller than his too but it fit nicely. Fjord wondered how it would feel to interlock Caleb’s fingers with his. He would imagine it, but for now, this was all he did.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’ll see you Friday.” Fjord said with another smile.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Y-Yes . . . See you Friday.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord was the one to depart this time. Knowing if he did not, he would probably follow Caleb all the way home. So he waved one last time before moving into the alleyway behind the Blooming Grove and out of Caleb’s sight.</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Naww look at their love blossoming<br/>I also ADORE adding jester into fics, she’s so fun to write and I really hope to write smut around her cos yknow she deserves it &lt;3</p><p>Pls give kudos and comment, it gives me the sanity I need to churn these chapters out lol<br/>@BluKrown on Twitter and Tumblr</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Chapter 5</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>It's been a while but here we are with another chapter, things are starting to speed up from here so buckle your seatbelts folks!</p><p>Disclaimer, I am not a fish expert so do not be surprised as I list out fun facts about fish that can easily be found via google lol</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Fjord pulled into a parking spot at the storefront after Caleb’s apartment. Pulling his parking brake and turning off the car to save gas, Fjord waited in the car. He pulled out his phone from his back pocket for the time, the digital clock declaring it was ten minutes to eleven. Unlocking his phone he opened up to his texts for the most recent conversation he had had with Caleb.</span>
</p><p>
  <b>Caleb: Would you be available from 11:00 am?</b>
</p><p>
  <b>Fjord: Yep do you want me to pick you up?</b>
</p><p>
  <b>Caleb: Yes, if you would not mind</b>
</p><p>
  <span>His eyes looking in his rearview mirror for the sight of Caleb’s redhead leaving the building but saw no such sign. As always, Fjord arrived earlier than scheduled as by thirty minutes before he had not been able to do anything productive except look at the text messages.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was Friday and Fjord was here to pick up Caleb for their next date. He had no idea what Caleb had planned and although part of him wanted to ask about it, there was a sort of giddiness at the prospect of this date being all Caleb’s doing.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>When the time on his phone listed it as five minutes to ten, Fjord messaged Caleb.</span>
</p><p>
  <b>Fjord: Bit early but I’m parked outside when your ready :)</b>
</p><p>
  <span>He had not even left the app when Caleb’s response came through.</span>
</p><p>
  <b>Caleb: I will come down now, see you in a minute :)</b>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord felt his leg begin to jitter and he soon had to wipe the palms of his hands on his jeans. He was still staring at his phone when there was a knock on the passenger side door that made Fjord actually jump.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Caleb smiled softly on the other side of the glass, waving a hand. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord unlocked the door to let him in. “M-Morning.” He mustered.</span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>“Good morning,” Caleb said rather breathlessly as he settled in the car.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The human wore a soft green sweater with a black and grey plaid button-up poking out from the collar. He wore brown slacks and simple shoes. Caleb was also breathing rather heavily as he put his keys into his pocket, his cheeks flushed even where they hid behind a newly grown scruff of a beard.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Had to use the stairs?”</span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>“Oh, uh, yes. I uhm, did not want to wait for an elevator so I took the stairs.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord had done a similar thing just this morning. The elevator always gave him a sense of unease, it was slow and unreliable as it may have to do multiple stops until he got to the ground floor. The silence of the moving box did not help things, especially when he was nervous. Busying himself with taking the stairs kept his mind from wandering too far from his steady steps. It seemed Caleb had a similar problem and it was difficult for Fjord not to smile at that.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So,” Fjord began lamely when Caleb buckled himself into his seat. “Where to, navigator?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Caleb let out a small huff of a laugh as he appeared to lookup an address on his phone. “Well, I will navigate you and you will find out when we get there.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Really going to keep this a surprise, huh?” Turning on the car’s engine.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Of course, otherwise it would not be a real surprise, would it?” Caleb said and looked up from his phone. “Erm, go straight and you will have to turn right after three lights.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Alrighty,” Fjord nodded, pulling his car out of his parking spot and onto the road.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>On the drive, Caleb and Fjord caught each other up on what they had done recently. Caleb did not go to the teahouse on Wednesday due to another meeting. So Fjord had not really seen him since Tuesday when they ate sandwiches in the park.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>While Fjord did not have much going outside of the Blooming Grove, Caleb had finally signed for his first book to be republished. The books had only been sold in the Empire up until now but with the new print, his publishers were intending to sell his book throughout Wildemount. And if the sales on ‘</span>
  <em>
    <span>A Love From Childhood’</span>
  </em>
  <span> was promising, a republishing of his other works may soon follow.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The only interesting story Fjord could tell was how one of Caduceus’ family members took up Jester’s shift in the kitchen one day. Caleb did not initially believe Fjord when he described how a quiet afternoon had been filled with Clay versus Clay pranks that he had often been the accidental recipient of.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m telling the truth!” Fjord said, faking indignancy as Caleb laughed. “I did not willingly open the freezer door to get a bucket of water dunked on my head. It was Caduceus, I know it. He walked right over and looked disappointed to see it was me that got caught, not his sister.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I will take your word on it but,” Caleb let out another chuckle as he eventually calmed down. “I would not have thought the teahouse owner was that sort of person.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Trust me, I did not think so either at first,” Fjord muttered as he took a left at Caleb’s silent indication. “But his siblings really bring out a completely different side of him.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I could see that as a possibility.” Caleb remarked, “I never had siblings so I would not know.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Really? An only child then?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes,” The human replied with a small smile. “And you?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh, er,” Fjord began lamely. He had not told Caleb yet that he did not have any siblings, or parents for that matter. The orphanage he had been primarily fostered in was not the most flourishing environment and Fjord could not see any of his fellow orphans as friends, let alone like a sibling. “No.” He said simply, hoping Caleb would not delve more.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Caleb did not, to Fjord’s great relief.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He was not sure how he should tell Caleb. When he said he was an orphan, half of the time, people appeared sympathetic but took it too far, walking on eggshells when family of any kind was brought up in conversation. While others babied him as if he was still a child. He did not know which Caleb was and part of him was hoping to keep the information from Caleb until he had a little more of a clue.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Caleb had Fjord turn into a wider city alley, with tall buildings hiding any visible sunlight. Fjord had never been the best at directions, at least in Rexxentrum anyway. The city was always changing, with new buildings rising while others fell. Not to mention when festivals were on, the city became unrecognisable. So Fjord really had no idea where Caleb was taking him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Please go down there,” Caleb indicated to a passage to an underground carpark. “And park where you like.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord obliged, still focusing on driving but letting his eyes look as they delved into the basement. There were not any decorations, signs or any indications of where or what this carpark was for which only made Fjord more and more curious. Fjord found a free parking spot on the floor below the entrance and noted the ‘B2-Aisle 9’ on the pillar nearby.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Aaand we are docked.” Fjord declared, pulling the key out of the ignition. “I’ve gotta admit I’m impressed that I still have no idea where we are.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You will see soon enough,” Caleb replied with a kind smile. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Out of the car and after a loud ‘click’ as Fjord locked the car, Caleb led the way to an elevator. While they waited, a young family of two adult tiefling and a child joined them for the elevator.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The girl only just got up to Fjord’s waist and stared up at him curiously while they held what appeared to be their mother’s hand. Fjord gave a polite smile, which must have meant something to the child because they spoke.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You here to see the fishies too, mister?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“The what?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“The fishies.” The child repeated and lifted up their hand. Within the small red-skinned palm, a well-worn clownfish hung from a small linked keychain. “Mummy said I can get another fishie and that there are penguins there too this time!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord looked to Caleb, who must have been listening in. Caleb quickly looked away when he saw Fjord turn to him. Opting to stare resolutely at the neon light above the elevator door that said what floor the lift was currently on, his cheeks softly pink and lips pursed. Clearly, his surprise had been revealed a bit too soon for his liking.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well, that sounds nice.” Fjord said, grinning back at the kid. “Are clownfish your favourite?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Mhm!” The child said excitedly, “Daddy says his favourite is the sea urchin cos’ it looks like a black star. And Mummy said her’s is the whale shark - that really biiiiig one that has a big mouth - but they don’t have that one here. What’s your favourite fishy, mister?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Aniza,” The tiefling that held the child’s hand warned, giving Fjord an apologetic look. “I’m sure this nice man is not interested in talking about fish.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s fine,” Fjord reassured, “Well when I was little I liked the pufferfish, the one that when it gets scared it puffs up like a balloon. Now I like the swordfish, it's mighty pretty and they’re tasty too.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Daddy says that salmon is a fish!” The kid said excitedly just as the elevator pinged and opened. “They’re on display too, they’re these big pink ones. It’s not as pretty as the clownfish though.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Salmons might not be the prettiest,” Fjord admitted, walking beside the child as they went into the elevator. “But they’re still pretty cool. Did you know that a salmon can jump two yards into the air?” When the child, clearly too young to be in school yet, did not seem impressed, he furthered, “That’s higher than me or your Daddy when we’re standing straight.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Aniza’s eyes grew wide as she twisted her head to look at her Dad. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, they’re pretty cool.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What about clownfish?” The tiefling demanded, waving the fish keychain in their hand. “Can they jump that high too?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No,” Fjord said initially and the child frowned. “But, they’re really good at hiding. They live in anemones, these living plants. Most of them can sting normal fish but clownfish live in them to stay safe.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Woah,” Aniza gasped, “You know a lot about fishies, mister. Do you work here?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Uh, no. I just really like fish.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Me too!” The child grinned.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The elevator pinged at that point, interrupting their conversation. The elevator door soon opened into what appeared to be a lobby area. The tiefling family took to leave the lift first, the child giving an excited wave to Fjord while their parents gave respectful nods.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So, the aquarium, huh?” Fjord asked Caleb as the two of them left the elevator, pausing to look around.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes,” Caleb muttered, “Surprise.” He said half-heartedly.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Are you upset that a kid spoiled your surprise?” Fjord asked with a smile of bemusement.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Caleb let out a guilty chuckle. “Well, I would not say upset but . . . Disappointed.” He looked to Fjord and the smile he wore was one of awkwardness. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord almost felt flattered that Caleb missed out on surprising him. He took Caleb’s hand, feeling the fingers twitch at the sudden touch. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey, it’s fine. I mean, it’s still amazing.” Fjord said, looking around the aquarium.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord had heard there was an aquarium but had never thought to go, what with the expensive tickets and having no one to go with. Until now, of course. The entrance hall they were in had tiled figures of fish, turtles, whales and other aquatic creatures swimming below their feet in a sea of teal tiles. The walls were covered with posters and bright sunlight shone through the skylights above. The hall was not busy, as to be expected by a Friday. But there was still a din as young families, tourists or curious locals flocked to the entrance gate for tickets.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord looked back to Caleb to see him easing a bit more, clearly the spoiled surprise did not matter enough for him to dwell on it further. Caleb’s fingers wriggled slightly in his hand until they interlocked with his own, making it a bit easier to walk as they joined the crowd of newcomers. Caleb led him not to the ticket master but the entrance, pulling his phone to show what must have been a digital copy on his phone to a guard. The staff member nodded and let them past into the aquarium at large. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Did you buy </span>
  <em>
    <span>both</span>
  </em>
  <span> of our tickets?” Fjord asked, recalling that an adult ticket was nearly a rather hefty sum. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Of course,” Caleb replied. “I would not allow you to buy your own ticket after all that you have done for me.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well, thank you. But now I must be obliged to tell you that I will be info-dumping you all the useless fish facts you could ever desire.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I would not have it any other way. Besides,” Caleb looked around for a moment as if to make sure no one was near as a blush crept up his neck. “I do not think any of the tour guides are anywhere near as handsome as you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord felt his skin burn and his whole chest do a summersault. “W-Well, we’ll see about that.” He mumbled, following Caleb into the aquarium.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord and Caleb spent all day at the aquarium. Walking to each enclosure to examine the creatures inside, Fjord always giving at least one fact about all of them. Fjord had tried to restrain himself at first, allow him and Caleb to wander the displays with little conversation. Merely admire the creatures. But soon, clearly not impressed by the given information on the enclosure signs, Caleb kept asking Fjord to tell him more. Soon enough Fjord was like an encyclopedia, listing off - what he thought at least - were fun and interesting things about the fish, bugs, mammals and other animals that had captured his fascination since he was a boy.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“And you say I have an impressive memory,” Caleb said at one point. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I mean, sure but only fish related stuff,” Fjord mumbled, peaking into a large tank that held spider crabs. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s like your superpower.” Caleb replied with a small laugh.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord snorted, “Is it a bird? Is it a plane? No, it’s Fish-Man.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord would reflect on the whole day being an absolute joy. But a few particularly stood out to him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>There was a section where visitors could hold starfish, shark eggs and some of the aquatic plants. They ran into the excited tiefling child again, who was squealing while holding a starfish in her hands. It was not until Fjord came over and offered some advice on where to touch that the disgust was washed away with fascination on the kid’s face.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>There was then the penguin enclosure. Fjord gladly taking the chance to feed the small fairy penguins when offered to by staff. The small flight-less birds flocking him but only reaching up to his knee. Caleb had refused, clearly a bit frightened of the idea of being surrounded by the little things so he watched behind the glass fence. Taking a few pictures on his phone and waving at him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Then, there was an underwater tunnel. It was the largest tank in the aquarium. And apart from having multiple glass lookout points, had a tunnel of glass that led them through the very enclosure. They had both paused to admire the flock of flounders and the big manta ray flying overhead. It was not until they had then looked around to find themselves alone in that tunnel. Having let go of his hand a while ago, Fjord had felt Caleb’s hand touch his.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Y-You sure you wanna hold hands? I get really sweaty palms.” Remembering he had been wiping his palms perpetually all day.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I-I do not mind it.” Caleb had muttered, interlocking the fingers just as they had done at the entrance.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The noise from outside the tunnel was faint so, for just a few moments, Fjord felt like a kid again. Deep under the water’s surface, swimming with the many fish and sharks of the ocean. All while holding Caleb’s hand. The blue shimmer of the water made Caleb look even more pale and although he stared off into the water, the warmth of his hand was ever-present. It was a beautiful memory and Fjord would gladly cherish it no matter what.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord had the thought to kiss him then. But it was so quiet. So serene. He did not want to ruin it by an attempt at public physical intimacy that Caleb might not want. But he thought about it. Next time. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord and Caleb had explored the aquarium until the crowds thinned and the exhibits began to close. Caleb never seemed to tire with Fjord’s boundless knowledge of all things aquatic. And even when there was a moment when Fjord was not bombarding him, the silence between them had been warm and pleasant. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>They returned back to the lobby and took a rather full elevator down to the basement to get back to the car. In the elevator, he was not holding Caleb’s hand. But with the crowd taking up most of the elevator, his shoulder and Caleb’s pressed together. The touch, although not particularly significant, made his heart thunder in his eardrums all the while. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He could not allow this night to end. Fjord could feel his chest ache with the meer idea of going home to his apartment alone. And that’s when he got an idea.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The elevator door opened on their desired floor and with a minor push past other occupants, got out. Through the car park - Caleb had remembered the parking spot far easier than Fjord could - they found Fjord battered car just where he left it. Fjord had his key in his hand but did not unlock the car as they approached it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Listen . . . I had a lot of fun today. Thank you for . . . Well, everything.” Fjord said, truthfully and gave a soft smile for good measure.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It was my pleasure, Fjord. It was . . . It was lovely to see you so animated, I could . . .” Caleb paused, ducking his head but Fjord could still see him blush. “I could listen to you talk about fish all day.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“O-Oh,” Fjord said dumbly, his mouth hurting with the effort it took to not grin. “W-Well . . . I know it’s not the same as an aquarium but. . .” He faulted, should he really say it? Caleb looked at him inquisitively but did not say anything. “W-Would you . . . Would you like to . . . T-To have a coffee with me at my place? O-Only if you want to though!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The invitation was well-meaning, Fjord merely wanted to be with Caleb for longer. He hoped it did not suggest anything more than a coffee. If something more did occur, he would not disapprove but he did not dare think about it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Caleb seemed to mull over his reply. His face still a blotchy but charming red as he licked his lips cautiously. “I would . . . I would like that a lot, actually.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Great,” Fjord said, letting out a sigh of relief in his head and heart. “Well . . . Shall we?”</span>
</p><hr/><p>
  <span>Fjord parked and led Caleb up to his apartment in strained but comfortable silence. Even in the elevator with the static stereo playing a cheery piano not really helping. Both men were visibly blushing as they accompanied each other to the fourth floor and to Fjord’s apartment door.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord had pulled out his key when he paused, realising something terrible. He had not cleaned up his place at all. He could imagine Caleb restraining a repulsed look at the state of his kitchen, the messy bed and the piles of uncleaned laundry. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Shit</span>
  </em>
  <span>.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Uh, would you be able to hang out here for a second? I wasn’t really prepared to have a . . . a guest over.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Caleb, never quite looking in Fjord’s eyes, nodded. “Y-Yes, that is fine.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“C-Cool, uhm, just wait here.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Unlocking the door and squeezing through the opening, so as to not allow Caleb to see the interior, he closed it immediately behind him. He then beheld his room to realise he had been right. It really was a mess. His kitchen and small dining table were covered in dirty dishes, his bed was not made and he could count at least five dirty articles of clothing from the doorstep. Trying to keep in mind that Caleb was graciously waiting outside, he raced to clean up. Stuffing any clothing, whether dirty or clean into his washing basket, he then stuffed it into his cupboards. Put his bag and gym rucksack in the corner as he fixed the bed, tossing on top a usually unused decorative pillow. To the kitchen, he stuffed as much of the dirty dishes into the dishwasher and the ones that did not fit were put in the sink. He wiped the counters and just at the last second remembered his ashtray. Which he pulled from the windowsill, emptied, and hid in his cereal cabinet.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Once the place looked satisfactory, Fjord let out a long breath. He then stood tall and went back to the door. Caleb stood outside, looking through the window in the hallway that showed the scattered tower skyline. The hallway was dark apart from the one dim light down the hall so Caleb’s face was in light shadow. He looked almost gaunt and there was a look on his face that Fjord could not categorise.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Caleb must have heard the door open as Fjord only caught a glimpse of the concerning look before it was hidden by a soft smile. “Everything alright?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Uh, Y-Yeah.” Fjord averted. “C’mon in.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord led Caleb inside and to the kitchen. He silently waved for his guest to take a seat at the bench. He then ducked under the counter to a cupboard to retrieve the miniature coffee maker. It was the same model as the one at the Blooming Grove but was only able to make one coffee at a time.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So er . . . what are we feeling?” Fjord asked politely as he placed the machine on the bench and plugged it in.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Erm . . . A long black if you would not mind?” Caleb asked, looking over the machine curiously. “Perhaps make it a decaf long black? It is a bit late for coffee.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh shoot, true,” Fjord mumbled, remembering the low sunset on the drive home. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Luckily, he did have the ingredients on hand for the decaffeinated variety and went about making Caleb’s order. Fjord rolled up his sleeves, did some cleaning of the components before pouring in enough coffee for two cups. With one press of the button, the machine began to hiss as it boiled the water, resonating in the quiet apartment.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“When did you start making coffee?” Caleb asked.  The human had placed his bag on the other stool and was leaning over the bench with his elbows and his chin in one hand. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Erm . . .” Fjord began, racking his brains as he wondered. “Just over three years I think . . .”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Did you learn at the Blooming Grove?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No, actually. I had a small job in Zadash while I was at university. I used to be a waiter but they needed someone to help the barista when it got busy so . . .” Fjord faded off simply, watching the boiled brown liquid pour into the coffee cup.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It is impressive that you own a professional coffee maker,” Caleb muttered, peaking to watch as well. “Is it a hobby?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah . . . You could say that.” Fjord said dumbly, “I kinda learnt from this one barista who swore by this stuff. Denounced any sort of pre-made or instant variety. I guess it kinda caught on.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hmm,” Caleb hummed, his bright blue eyes watching Fjord as he went to the fridge to retrieve milk. “What would your coffee of choice be?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Uhm . . .” Fjord began, not finding a quick answer more because he was focusing. Watching the milk as it boiled in a tin jug. “Is it bad to say any? Just depends on what I’m in the mood for. I’m thinking . . . I’m thinking I’ll make a long black for myself.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>When his fingertips stung from the boiling metal of the jug, he easily poured the hot milk into the coffee cup. Trying his best, he turned the cup appropriately as he created a simple artwork of a leaf out of the milky foam. When he was finished he settled the coffee cup on a saucer and slid it across the table to Caleb.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Enjoy.” Fjord said simply with a smile. Pausing to watch Caleb have his first sip.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Caleb closed his eyes as he took the initial drink, the steam from the cup faltering when he took a breath. </span>
  <em>
    <span>How is it possible to make even drinking coffee attractive?</span>
  </em>
  <span> Fjord asked himself frustratingly, leaning onto the bench.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Perfect,” Caleb said simply, giving a soft smile over his cup. “I must say, I have been to a few cafes but you really do make the best coffee.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“O-Oh,” Fjord began rubbing his lips between his teeth. “T-Thanks. But its nothing really.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It must be difficult to perfect it, correct?” Caleb asked before taking a healthy sip from his cup. Both freckled hands clasping the cup between them. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I mean, I practice sure . . . It’s not too hard to learn.” Fjord mumbled, scratching the back of his head awkwardly. “H-Here, lemme show you.” Gesturing for Caleb to come around the bench and inside the kitchen. Caleb looked hesitant but seemed to oblige.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He took one last gulp before getting from his seat. “S-Should I remove my sweater? I would not like to get it dirty.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“S-Sure,” Fjord began, noting that the handsome green sweater did look of a nice make. “I doubt you’ll be that messy but better safe than sorry.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Y-Yes,” Caleb mumbled, tugging the sweater over his and Fjord felt himself stiffen.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Caleb was wearing suspenders. Black with silver buckles over his plaid button-up. They hugged to his chest and drew a strong defined line down his torso to his trousers. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It took all of Fjord’s strength to not goggle at the sight and say, “B-Best to roll up your sleeves, too.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Ah, of course,” Caleb replied as he hung his sweater nicely on the stool’s back. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He then moved towards where Fjord stood in the kitchen, his thumbs adjusting the button of his sleeve shirt. It was not until he was beside him that Fjord noticed Caleb was struggling. His fingers were shaking slightly, straining to prise the button out of the hole to loosen the cuff.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“M-May I . . . ?” Fjord asked politely, extending his hand.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Caleb looked confused for a moment but soon caught on. “O-Oh . . . Uhm . . . If you would not mind.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He then reached out and allowed Fjord to hold his arm as he went about undoing the button. They were small and rather fiddly little things. They did not seem well suited for Fjord’s larger fingers as he tried to undo the button. It took a moment but he succeeded. Without letting go, Fjord rolled up the sleeve. Tucking the first part of the sleeve back in on itself and folding it. He did this two times until it reached Caleb’s elbow. He then took the other and repeated the same. It took Fjord a little less time with this arm, luckily used to the button to free it in a few seconds. When Caleb’s pale, freckled forearms were clear of his sleeves, Fjord looked up. He did not realise how close Caleb was, perhaps a bit too focused to realise. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He looked so handsome that it made Fjord’s heartache. His blue eyes were calm but Fjord could not help but sense there was a twinkle of something like fear. The human’s mouth was partially open, as if on the cusp of words that had now seemed to have left him. His auburn hair and beard shone gold in the light of Fjord’s kitchen, partially clashing with the dark red of his cheeks.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He wanted to kiss him. He really did. If now, then when?</span>
</p><p><em><span>Do I ask? </span></em><span>Fjord asked himself, his heartbeat thumping in his ears. </span><em><span>Avantika hated when I asked. She thought-</span></em> <em><span>Shut up! This isn’t her. She’s not here and you’re not in Zadash</span></em><span>. </span><em><span>. . But that doesn’t mean Caleb wouldn't think it’s lame.</span></em></p><p>
  <span>Even as Fjord’s mind raced, he could see Caleb. His eyes were looking between his, even so often darting to his own lips.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“U-Urm, Fjord?” Caleb asked grabbing Fjord’s full attention. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Y-yeah?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“This may sound . . . strange but . . .” Fjord could almost see Caleb’s wish to look away and avert his eyes. But something kept him there, looking right at him. “I would . . . I would very much like it if I could . . . Could . . . Could k-kiss you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord wanted to take a moment to let the request settle in, allow just the sheer thought of Caleb wanting that to make him float away in a feeling of joy. But then Caleb began to ramble.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I-It is fine if you do not, I may have m-mistaken this-”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“N-No!” Fjord said quickly, taking hold of both of Caleb’s hands. “I . . . I would really like to k-kiss you as well.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“O-Oh . . .” Caleb said simply, his cheeks flushing even redder - if that was possible.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“W-Would you m-mind if I  . . . ?” Fjord began, one hand lifting from Caleb’s wrist, cool with sweat and shaking, to touch his chin.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Y-Yes . . .”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord felt his throat swallow, his eyes darting all over Caleb’s face for any sign of contradiction. Apart from the nervous tremor he could feel from Caleb’s hand, there was nothing. So, he kissed him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>His lips were warm and soft. They too were trembling but even that stopped. Fjord regretted not putting on any sort of lip balm as he soon realised his lips were rather chapped. But Caleb did not pull away. In fact, he could feel Caleb closen, taking the half step until they were almost chest to chest. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was just as Fjord had thought, in that moment in the underwater tunnel. The warmth and presence of Caleb was all he knew as the rest of the world seemed to vanish. He felt like he was fifteen, kissing a girl in school when they were stuck in a closet together as a dare. It was, of course, different. But he did not mind it. He felt comfort in the smell of Caleb’s musk cologne, enjoying the soft tang of coffee on his lips and only wished to touch even more of the beard he could feel brushing his chin and fingers.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Pulling away, Fjord opened his eyes to see a sight that he wished he could paint. Eyes still closed, eyebrows softened and lips still ever pursued as if he had expected the kiss to go longer. His eyes opened soon after, darting over Fjord’s features as if he was thinking the very same thing.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I . . .” Fjord began, his brain going half of its normal speed, “I r-really like you Caleb . . . I-If you wouldn’t mind I would . . . I would really like to kiss you again.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Caleb visibly swallowed, his tongue darting out to lick his lips. “I . . .” He paused, his eyes averting as something, again, washed his features for just a moment. “I . . . Feel the same way.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Then . . .”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“P-Please.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lips against lips, Fjord closed his eyes. Goosebumps rising up his arms as he felt one of Caleb’s hand interlock with his own while the other clutched at the hand on his chin. Fjord’s lips soon moved with his, caressing and silently showing without words what they may be too afraid to outwardly say. This kiss kept on going, neither simply interested in stopping any time soon. </span>
  <span>Fjord, confidence up somewhat with Caleb’s continuous consent, let his tongue cautiously brush Caleb’s lips. A non-verbal attempt at escalating their kiss further. Fjord could faintly hear the sound of a deep breath through Caleb’s nose before the human’s own tongue emulated his.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The kiss, once soft and cherishing, quickened and heartened further. Both of Fjord’s hands were at Caleb’s chin while Caleb’s arms were soon wrapped around his neck, urging him ever closer. It all changed when Caleb, perhaps out of an air of heated flirtation, softly bit at Fjord’s lower lip. This may not have intended to be anything more than just playfulness but it did far more than that for Fjord. </span>
  <span>He felt his heart, already a hardy drum in his inner ear, quicken. His skin awash with another wave of goosebumps while a heated warmth went down to the bottom of his stomach, awakening between his legs. He leaned closer, easing Caleb to press his back to the bench. Keeping Caleb’s mouth close he freed one hand to brace onto the edge of the counter beside Caleb for balance. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But then, something went wrong. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>From the bite on Fjord’s lip to where he had pushed Caleb against the counter, he had done something wrong. Horribly, horribly wrong.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Caleb’s body suddenly froze, his lips stopping and all of his muscles tensing. Fjord was about to pull away and ask what was wrong when he felt it. Caleb pushed him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was a weak push but it was enough for him to give the human enough space to get out from around him. Quickly he went out of the kitchen, he went through the open door of the bathroom and slammed it shut behind him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The silence Caleb left behind was deafening. And Fjord could only stand there, shocked, shaken and confused. Even his mind could not comprehend what happened, as he stared at where Caleb had once been in his arms.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Shit. Shit!</span>
  </em>
  <span> Fjord thought, horrified at what this must mean.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He wanted to run to the bathroom door but instead, he walked, trying to keep a calm and empty head. Before he knocked, he heard noises inside. The sound of running water from the sink, splashing of it and very heavy breathing. It sounded like Caleb was hyperventilating, as he could hear breaths far more rugged and uneven than simply from their kiss.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fjord knocked, as soft as he could so as not to frighten Caleb. The water still ran but the breaths stopped.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“C-Caleb?” Fjord called. Concern, regret, confusion, worry and fear all pulling at his vocal cords. “Are . . . A-Are you alright in there? D-Do you need anything?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>There was a pause, the running water the only noise for a very long while. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“W-Would you . . . Would you please g-g-give me some space, please? I need to . . . I-I need to . . .” Caleb's voice was strained and heavy with what can only be described as fear. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“A-Alright . . .” Fjord replied. Obeying Caleb’s request and returning back to the kitchen.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Everything was just as it had been a few moments prior. Caleb’s green sweater hanging from a stool, his satchel still on the free seat. The coffee machine sat on the bench, a meter on the side reminding Fjord that there was still coffee left for one more cup.  </span>
  <span>Caleb’s own decaf long black sat, half-empty, in its saucer. The steam from the drink only visible if Fjord squinted his eyes. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Even with his stomach churning and heart aching, he could only think one thing clearly. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>I should at least make sure he has a warm cup of joe when he comes out</span>
  </em>
  <span>.</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>whaaaat? cliffhanger in my fanfiction? yeah, not unless I want to be going past 6k words (yikes)</p><p>pls let me know your thoughts on the fic so far in the commentss, it is my inspiration to keep writing :s<br/>@BluKrown on twitter and tumblr</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Chapter 6</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Fjord had waited in the kitchen for over an hour. Only knowing the time when he looked to the digital clock on his microwave. At first, he stood behind the counter, cleaning the bench and washing the dishes that he had stuffed in the sink earlier. Then he opted to sit on the free stool, scrolling through his phone and trying his best to keep his ear keened to any noise from the bathroom. Whether it was more running water, a toilet flushing or a door opening. Anything. Just to know Caleb was ok was enough.</p><p>Eventually, Fjord got up and went to the cereal cupboard, pulling out his discarded ashtray to put it back on the windowsill. He had the urge to have a cigarette for over an hour but had restrained himself just in case Caleb came out. But the nervousness and sickness in his gut had worn all restraint away by that point. So he pulled himself up on the counter beside the window, opened the glass to the cold night air and pulled out the last cigarette from the box he bought. It was the same box from that Friday night when he ran into Caleb at the bus stop. The barcode sticker on the back had been ripped off and the cardboard itself was bent and misshapen as Fjord had stuffed it into pockets and bags for nearly two weeks. </p><p><em> Has it really only been two weeks? It feels so much longer than that. </em> Fjord lamented, finding the matches in one of the drawers and lighting the cigarette. Letting his back lean against the kitchen wall, his first nicotine breath was long and slow. He savoured the buzz that travelled through his body as the smoke went through his lungs. Looking through the window, he blew a cloud of smoke into the air, watching it quickly vanish in the night.</p><p>Fjord watched the night sky, squinting for any sight of a star but had no luck. The yellow glow of the city brightening the sky so that nothing but the silver light of moon Catha and the reddish-purple glow of the smaller moon Ruidus were distinguishable.  Fjord was not sure if he liked that. Port Demali had been renowned for its beautiful view of the ocean and star-filled skies just by the port. He remembered going out to the docks in summer to bask in the glow of the two moons and galaxy of stars. Even Zadash had been better. As even in the Trispires, he had always been able to find a spattering of distant lights in the black night. </p><p>There was a click and a faint squeak as a door opened. Fjord wanted to turn and stare but he felt that he would only be making an even bigger deal about what happened if he did. So he sat on the counter for a bit longer, letting a spring wind gust through his window before he blew out a last plume of smoke. When he heard footsteps, faint and slow along the floorboards, he pressed the butt of the cigarette in the ashtray and slid the container behind his back. He still sat on the bench, watching as an auburn head came into view.</p><p>Caleb looked pale, his freckles all the more obvious over his cheeks and nose. His hair had become further mused, the curls whirring at different angles and he had undone the first two buttons on his shirt. Before the kiss, Caleb had looked handsome, shining in warmth. Now, although he still had his looks, he looked hollow and cold. It only made Fjord ever the more worried and guilty.</p><p>“H-Hey,” Fjord began, trying not to feel hurt when he saw Caleb visibly jump at his voice. “How . . . How are you feeling?”</p><p>Caleb was quiet for a moment, reaching the stools by the bench and placing both hands on the back of one. His blue eyes were resolutely on the satchel in one of the seats. “I . . . I am . . . I am alright.”</p><p>Fjord let out a soft sigh, clasping his hands together and squeezing them in an attempt to ease the ache in his chest. “I . . . I don’t know what happened but . . . If . . . If it was something I did, I’m really sorry.” Fjord wanted to look away but he did not. Sincerity was, once again, the only thing he could give.</p><p>“It . . . It was not your fault, n-no.” Caleb mumbled, his hand shaking as he pulled the stool aside to sit. “It . . . It was not your fault.” He repeated, staring at the tile of the bench.</p><p>“O-Oh,” Fjord said, a small weight leaving his shoulders. “C-Caleb . . . I . . . I meant what I said. I really . . . Really do like you, in a romantic sense. But . . . But I don’t want you to think I . . . I expect anything from you. Not unless you're comfortable. It . . .” He could feel the moment when Caleb’s hands had pushed at his chest to get out of his way. “It’s my fault I didn’t check in on you as things got . . . Got out of hand.”</p><p>“Thank you . . .” Caleb mumbled, his fingers slowly unfurling the rolled sleeves.</p><p>“If you . . . If you wouldn’t mind, I would just like to know what . . . what caused it. I’ll make sure not to do anything like it again. But . . . But you don’t have to tell me why . . . or anything like that. I just wanna not mess anything up.”</p><p>Caleb was quiet again, pulling on his sweater over his head and adjusting the collar so he looked just as neat as when he arrived. When he was finished and clearly nothing else to distract himself with, he spoke. “It . . . E-Everything was going fine until . . . Until . . . Until you pressed me to the b-bench.” Caleb swallowed hard, his Adam’s apple bobbing fearfully in his throat. “It was so sudden and . . . And I felt t-trapped and . . . A-and scared. I-I’m sorry, it’s my fault. I should not have encouraged you, it’s my fault. I should not have done that I-”</p><p>“Caleb.” Fjord said firmly, interrupting Caleb’s fearful rambling. He could see the human’s shoulders were stiff and shaking, and the human’s chest rising and falling rapidly. He clearly looked like he was nearly relapsing again. “Don’t . . . Don’t blame yourself for that. It wasn’t your fault. Don’t think that something upsetting you is your fault.”</p><p>Caleb’s eyes visibly glittered with tears. He rested his elbows on the bench and hid his face in his hands. Fjord could not understand it but he could hear Caleb mumbling something in Zemnian. </p><p>Fjord felt a bit awkward sitting on the counter so he pulled himself off. He wanted to go and touch Caleb, physically comfort him. But the thought of Caleb running back into the bathroom and locking the door was far too likely, so he did not. For a moment, Fjord stood rather lamely in the kitchen, only able to look concerned at the man at the bench. Thinking any action was better than standing there, he got a glass from the clean dish rack and poured some water. He then placed it into Caleb’s reach on the counter.</p><p>“Thank you . . . For telling me what I did wrong.” Fjord said, trying to be calm when Caleb’s Zemnian whispers ceased. “I won’t do it again. Caleb I . . . I don’t want to push you. If this is all too much . . . Us dating, then I understand.” The thought of ending what they had hurt, but if it at least meant Caleb did not become so upset, it was a high price Fjord would willingly pay. </p><p>Caleb rubbed his eyes with the heel of both hands, sniffing once. Pulling his hands away, his eyes and nose looked red but some of the colour had returned to his face nonetheless. “I . . . I don’t want . . . I don’t want what we’ve been doing to end . . . I just . . . I just don’t think I’ll feel c-comfortable going past kissing at this time.”</p><p>Fjord felt even more relief at Caleb’s words but kept it to himself. “I-I understand.”</p><p>They were both then silent, Caleb taking the time to take a few healthy gulps from the glass. There was also the occasional sniff and soft cough as Caleb slowly calmed down.</p><p>“You . . . You smoke?” Caleb asked, breaking the silence.</p><p>“W-What?” Fjord said abruptly, surprised.</p><p>“Do you smoke? I . . . I can smell it. And there is an ashtray behind you.”</p><p>“Oh shoot,” Fjord muttered, going to the window and opening it wider. “M-My bad, I know it smells, lemme just. . .” He then poured the ashes of the cigarette into the bin and rinsed the ashtray in the sink.</p><p>“D-Don’t worry,” Caleb mumbled, “I’m . . . I’m just surprised.”</p><p>“Really?”</p><p>“Yeah . . . You do not seem the type that would smoke.”</p><p>“Well . . .” Fjord mumbled, scratching the back of his neck. “I’m tryin’ to kick the habit but . . . y’know, old habits die hard.”</p><p>“So you have been smoking for a while?”</p><p>“Yeah well . . . Since high school probably. I don’t do it a lot . . . recently the only reason I even do is because I could afford it.”</p><p>“I see . . .”</p><p>Fjord had been irrationally worried Caleb would dislike him for this vice. Avantika had. She had threatened to break up with him multiple times over it. She had hated the smell and said he looked like a 'bum' whenever she caught him smoking. Fjord felt bad for assuming Caleb was like Avantika. Because he most definitely was not. He was far kinder and warmer than Avantika had ever been. And yet he found himself constantly comparing the two. Maybe because he was worried about what happened between him and her would happen to him and Caleb.</p><p>“Would . . . Would you like me to make you another coffee or . . . ?” Fjord asked, wanting to leave his sudden wandering thoughts.</p><p>“Uhm . . .” Caleb began, licking his lips wearily as he looked from Fjord to his bag. “I would but . . . It’s getting late so I should probably start going home.”</p><p>“Y-Yeah, understandable.” Fjord began and watched, silently sad, as Caleb got up and took his bag. “Would you mind me giving you a lift home, at least?”</p><p>“Erm . . . If you would not mind, that would be appreciated, yes.”</p><p>“Cool, er, lemme get my keys.”</p><p>Fjord led Caleb through the hallway, down the elevator and into the parking bay to his car. Getting in, Fjord made sure to turn on the heater as he saw Caleb seemed to distinctly shiver as they left the elevator.</p><p>“Do you need me to give you directions?” Caleb asked, pulling his phone from his bag. </p><p>“Er, yeah if you wouldn’t mind.”</p><p>The drive was quick but, for Caleb’s sake, he was thankful that all lights were green and no traffic kept them. It only took twenty minutes to arrive outside Caleb’s apartment building, the familiar well-trimmed hedges and handsomely decorated entrance a bittersweet welcome.</p><p>“Welp, here we are.” Fjord stated lamely. </p><p>There was another quiet, both men looking to the entrance. As if staring at it would make it move another twenty minutes away, at least in Fjord's mind. Then, both spoke at the same time.</p><p>“Listen, Caleb-”</p><p>“Fjord, I-”</p><p>They both paused, looking at the other with a look of pleasant surprise. Caleb gave a small smile, which Fjord emulated. </p><p>“You first,” Caleb said, nodding to him politely.</p><p>“Oh . . . Uh . . . Well . . .” Fjord began, forgetting what he had meant to say. Relief at Caleb’s ease washing away any need to speak. “I had . . . I had a lot of fun today, at the aquarium, I mean. It . . . It meant a lot to me that you planned that all out for me.”</p><p>“I-It was my pleasure,” Caleb replied, the smile only growing warmer. “I know you said otherwise but . . . I truly am sorry about how I made things . . . awkward in the end. E-Everything before that I liked very much . . .”</p><p>“I-I’m . . . I’m happy to hear that,” Fjord could feel a familiar warm flush grow on his face when he recalled their kiss. “But I am fine with any awkwardness when it comes to making you feel more comfortable. I’m . . . I’m happy to accommodate for what you want, Caleb. I’m willing to . . . to wait and to help.”</p><p>Fjord felt worry as he saw Caleb’s eyes glitter with tears, but they were of a happier variety as it did not falter Caleb’s smile. “I . . . I really do appreciate your understanding . . . I really do.”</p><p>Fjord took the risk and placed his hand above both of Caleb’s where they were in his lap. One hand left to wipe at his eyes but the one that was still there opened to enclose with Fjord’s. He was still warm and the soft squeeze he gave was a silent thanks.</p><p>“Well . . .” Caleb began once his eyes were clear of tears. “H-Have a good night, Fjord.”</p><p>“You too, Caleb.”</p><p>Caleb unbuckled his seatbelt and readjusted the strap of his bag. Before opening the door, he looked back to Fjord in the driver’s seat and leaned forward. He gave him a kiss on his lips, soft and fleeting, just like the first one he gave him. The only difference being, Caleb paused. Fjord may have been mistaken but he thought he saw a look of yearning like he wanted to give him more. But it was gone as he gave a final smile and final squeeze of his hand.</p><p>Fjord watched Caleb leave, not turning the engine back on until Fjord had to strain to see Caleb through the glass of the building.</p><hr/><p>Fjord was not sure if he should be excited or nervous when Tuesday arrived. Caleb had texted to say he would be there and although both had given the green light to continue seeing each other, Fjord could not help but worry Caleb may be scared around him.</p><p>Today, the Blooming Grove was louder than usual. Heavy rain and the occasional threatening crack of thunder had forced most customers to seek shelter inside the teahouse. By ten o’clock most tables were occupied with sodden heads at tables and a crowd of customers with dripping umbrellas at the open fireplace. </p><p>Fjord was disappointed to find Caleb did not come into the cafe on time. He was probably busy at home or caught up in traffic but there was still that little worm of doubt in his mind. Maybe he changed his mind. Maybe he was going to avoid the Blooming Grove so he did not have to see Fjord outside of their dates. All such things sounded ridiculous but still, he could not help but consider them.</p><p>It was not until a quarter past twelve that the door to the teahouse opened. Fjord said a call of welcome without looking, packing four black moss cupcakes into a package. He handed the order to a burly goliath who nodded and took to brave the weather outside. Fjord wiped his hands on the towel hanging from his apron pocket as he looked to the line. A gaggle of high school-aged Dragonborn, regulars who all left school to sneak a coffee on their lunch break, a gnome and dwarf couple and one rather grumpy tortle all tried to call his attention. Although he helped out the elderly tortle first, he could not help but give a passing grin to Caleb who he finally caught sight of. He had an umbrella in one hand but Fjord could see a spattering of rain covering most of his person.</p><p>With the tortle sorted and the small couple being served by Caduceus, Fjord was relieved to see the dragonborn group were all too busy drooling over the food display to order. So he gestured for Caleb to come to the register.</p><p>“Afternoon,” Fjord said with a smile, trying to give an air of casual ease. “Got caught up with something?”</p><p>“Yes, well,” Caleb began as he fumbled around in his bag for his wallet. “I was going to wait out the storm but then I realised it had no sign of stopping.”</p><p>“So you took the bus, in <em> this </em> weather?” Fjord asked, nodding to the heavy raindrops that clattered against the glass windows.</p><p>“It was not an enjoyable ride, that is for certain,” Caleb muttered as he found and pulled out the same leather wallet. “A long black and . . . what would you recommend?”</p><p>“Hrm . . .” Fjord hummed, leaning his head to eye the cabinet. “Jester has already started making lunch so I would recommend the black moss muffin otherwise we always have some plain or chocolate croissants.”</p><p>“I will have the black moss muffin then,” Caleb requested, counting out the change in his hand.</p><p>“Too early for lunch?” Taking the money in Caleb’s outstretched hand. </p><p>Caleb paused, halfway to putting his wallet away. “Well . . . Not necessarily . . . I was . . . I was hoping we could spend lunch together when you are on break . . .”</p><p>Fjord did not stop his wide smile, the bell of the door reflecting his mood. “I mean, sure, but wouldn’t I be interrupting your work?”</p><p>“N-Not at all . . .”</p><p>“Well, if you don’t mind waiting, my break is at two-thirty.”</p><p>“That is perfectly fine.”</p><p>Caleb then took to the only open table, a two-person table against the brick wall of the teahouse. Fjord knew it was not Caleb’s favourite spot but he did not appear bothered. Due to the unexpected rise in dine-in customers, Caduceus had asked his older brother Colton to waiter. Which left Fjord at the barista station and till and admire the human from afar.</p><p>Thankfully, Caduceus was never one to keep Fjord working into his lunch shift and freed him when there was a lull in customers finally. Caduceus was also fine with him eating in the teahouse, as the staff occasionally did resort to that on the cold, rain or snow days. So, with a salmon sandwich and chicken sandwich on separate plates and Caleb’s second coffee, Fjord went to Caleb’s table.</p><p>Caleb was frowning at his laptop screen, his fingers on the arrow keys and he seemed to be scrolling through a document. He had tied up his hair into a half-hearted bun and hung his damp jacket on the back of his chair. </p><p>“Work going alright?” Fjord asked when he approached.</p><p>“Hm, I would not say ‘alright’ but it is getting somewhere,” Caleb muttered, pushing the computer aside so he had space for his plate.</p><p>“Struggling?” Fjord then took the seat opposite.</p><p>“More uninspired.” Caleb then closed the laptop to look at Fjord. “And you? How is work?”</p><p>“Alright, been busy but I’m glad Colton is working and not one of his sisters.”</p><p>“Is he not as mischievous like his siblings?”</p><p>“No, more like he is far sneakier so me and Jester don’t get caught up in it.”</p><p>Caleb let out a chuckle, helping himself to his sandwich. Fjord followed suit and they had a few moments of amiable quiet as they ate. Caleb was nearly finished, putting down his food to down a gulp of his coffee when he started conversation.</p><p>“I’m curious . . . Please tell me if I’m being intrusive but what was your . . . Romantic history up to now?”</p><p>The questions surprised him but Fjord recalled that the topic had never come up before. It had been mostly out of politeness and he felt like it was not his place to know, especially after Friday. He could not deny he wanted to know but he supposed he would have to say his piece first.</p><p>“Uhh . . . Well, just to start off, I’m uh, bi.” Fjord started, keeping a close eye on Caleb’s face. He knew Caleb did not seem the sort to be biphobic but it did not stop him from being nervous stating it aloud. “So I’ve dated women but I’ve always been into men too. Just . . . Never got around to it.”</p><p>“That is understandable,” Caleb lamented after a sip of coffee. “I did not know I was bi until I was in university.”</p><p>“R-Really?”</p><p>“Yeah, well, being born and raised in the country-side did not help matters.”</p><p>“I was kinda similar.” Fjord combed a hand through his short hair to then scratch at the nape of his neck again. “I dated girls in high school and . . . And had a long term relationship in university with this one girl . . . I would’ve liked to have dated guys but I didn’t really know where to start until . . .” He faded off, giving a nod at Caleb who visibly blushed.</p><p>“I did not date until university,” Caleb admitted with a guilty smile. “Bookish and all, it was not until I found other nerds that I . . . found my calling, you could say.”</p><p>“Did you have any long term partners?”</p><p>“Er, yes. One boy and one girl and . . .” Caleb’s face went dark, licking his lips as his fingers started twisting the coffee cup in its saucer. “And . . . And other things.”</p><p>Fjord had a feeling ‘other things’ may be related to Caleb’s panic attack on Friday. The thought of a partner or partners that could create that sort of distress made white-hot anger boil in Fjord’s belly. He wanted to politely ask for names and addresses to beat the bastards up but knew better. It was not his place. This was Caleb’s life and Fjord was nowhere close enough to be permitted rights for such details.</p><p>“You certainly have more experience than me in the dating market, then.” Fjord said, trying to get Caleb to leave those darker thoughts behind.</p><p>“Well, only by a little.”</p><p>Fjord snorted as he took the last bite of sandwich, “You give me way too much credit."</p><p>"So . . . I am the first man you have persued?" Caleb asked tentatively.</p><p>"Yeah .  . . I hope that's not a turn off for you."</p><p>"No, not at all. In fact, it surprises me."</p><p>"Surprises you?" Fjord repeated, perturbed.</p><p>"You . . ." Caleb began while his cheeks reddened. "You . . . You're very good at it. Dating, I mean. Last night you were . . . You were very compassionate and you are always considerate of how I feel."</p><p>Fjord was struck dumb for a moment. It was odd to be complimented not on his charms or his looks, but his kindness. It was an odd but warm feeling. He was glad Caleb thought he was that sort of person. Fjord <em>hoped</em> he was that sort of person.</p><p>"Well I er . . ." Fjord started but paused. He wanted to tell him. Tell him about her and the great yet horrible time he had had in those two years. But he did not want to make Caleb uncomfortable. "I . . . I've seen how some relationships go and . . . And I try to not be like that. I want to make my partner feel safe and . . . loved." He said the second word rather cautiously, not wanting to throw around such a passionate word so suddenly.</p><p>"I think that is a beautiful sentiment to have," Caleb said simply and he reached out touched Fjord's hand. "And I think you are doing just that."</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Fjord is inexperienced in the areas of caring for someone with trauma/panic attacks. I hope I portrayed his well meaning awkwardness well, as he will have to learn on his feet how to look out for Caleb. I think it’s something many people have to go through and I will say there will be times where Fjord might not know what to do in future.</p><p>Please comment and share this fic as this’ll probably the longest fic I have written and I really need the encouragement 🥴<br/>@BluKrown on Twitter and Tumblr</p>
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